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    dots Submission Name: Existing Just to Forgetdots

    Author: darkness child
    ASL Info:    21/F/Michigan
    Elite Ratio:    3.07 - 195/266/48
    Words: 129
    Class/Type: Poetry/Sorry
    Total Views: 1137
    Average Vote:    3.0000
    Bytes: 922

       This is the over-dramatized version of my life right now. Enjoy!

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsExisting Just to Forgetdots

    Calm. Cold. And broken inside,
    Nothing left but regrets.
    Stumbling through life, always waiting to die,
    She's existing just to forget.

    Wishing she could erase that day,
    Her entire life fell apart.
    The world moves around her, vision is grey,
    Reflecting a hue of her darkened heart.

    Everyone's talking to her,
    Her automated responses always suffice.
    Everyone's seeing through her,
    Her mind and soul so encased in ice.

    He loved her so much, so perfectly,
    In her mind, that was all she would need.
    If only she could take back the day,
    Unable. To her fate she now will concede.

    Dreary days, she can't break the cycle,
    Nothing penetrates the grey.
    Routine after routine, robotic lifestyle,
    She's pretending to live, yet she dies each day.

    Submitted on 2006-06-29 14:20:10     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
      great write , i love how in all your work your emotions come through so well, keep it up
    | Posted on 2006-09-20 00:00:00 | by tammytompkins | [ Reply to This ]
      i thought that it was good. very well-written. it has good emotion and it runs very deep. the imagery is very good and this poem makes you think. i wouldn't change a thing. keep up the good work. check out some of my writes if you get a chance.
    | Posted on 2006-06-29 00:00:00 | by maquiladora | [ Reply to This ]
      Whoah.. it looks like you're goin through a lot... but you did say that it was over- dramatized. Anywas.... you did a good job writing this piece. It was as if I could feel everything that you wrote.

    This was by far my favourite part:

    Wishing she could erase that day,
    Her entire life fell apart.
    The world moves around her, vision is grey,
    Reflecting a hue of her darkened heart.

    It was ver descriptive, and ..to me... it felt like it was the most thought out....maybe not but that is hoe I felt about it.

    This whole poem was really great. Nice job.

    ~ Gotham Freak ~
    | Posted on 2006-06-29 00:00:00 | by GothamFreak | [ Reply to This ]
      This was written very well. I have to say I liked to so much because it was very detailed. I imagined different pictures the whole time I read it, and each time. This was very good write, I have no complaints. Please check out some of my writes if you ever get the chance. Keep up the fantastic work, and I'll keep reading.

    | Posted on 2006-06-29 00:00:00 | by heartofxwinterx | [ Reply to This ]

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