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    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Injectiondots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: DeadGod
    ASL Info:    20/M/OR
    Elite Ratio:    3.22 - 61/103/31
    Words: 187
    Class/Type: Lyrics/Passion
    Total Views: 1440
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1320



    Description:
       I just wrote this song yesterday. Putting guitar to it today. It's pretty fast-paced, kind of punk-rocky. If you have trouble reading it with the rhythm, think punk-rock.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsInjectiondots
    -------------------------------------------


    Pass me that cigarette
    And it's fifteen drags with my fucked-up rewind
    Your face costs all my money
    And all the faith that I blew on white lines

    Just ask those stupid questions
    The ones that broke my heart in high school
    Let's mock my intuition
    Tell Darwin that I quit the gene pool

    (Chorus)
    And God forbid that this falls out
    the regular way
    Cause when our cards are down there's
    nothing left to say


    Fast-paced, you're past my limits
    Don't blink, don't breathe, don't run away now
    Red lace with black sunglasses
    Can't think, can't leave, can't stop to pray now

    Jacked up, please floor the pedal
    A two-way trip toward elation
    Your body's yellow-taped
    And it's subject to investigation

    (Chorus)
    And God forbid that this falls out
    the regular way
    Cause when our cards are down there's
    nothing left to say
    Baby

    Fuck you, fuck me, and everything you
    Fuck me, fuck you, and everything I
    Fuck this, fuck this, and everything it
    Fuck you, fuck you, and everything you stand for





    Submitted on 2006-06-29 17:29:48     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      I had no trouble reading it, and I f*cking love it.
    I must admit, most lyrics I've read on here lately haven't been written very well... but this is perfect.

    I'm sorry I can't make this longer... I just wanted to mention how much I enjoyed it before I fall asleep (which will probably be in about three minutes).

    There is nothing to critique here.

    Good stuff, dude. Thanks for sharing.

    -nikkki
    | Posted on 2007-12-27 00:00:00 | by Razor2TheRosary | [ Reply to This ]
      This was a very good song! I read it once, as fast as I could...then ran with it a little faster...and then a little slower the third time, and by the fourth, I did have a good tempo and enunciation process going on in my head. Dont know if it matches how you envision it with the music, but I was able to get it workin with the music in me. The chorus was great. But the F-U/F-me lines were a little tricky...I think there is probably a tempo change or what not in those lines, but without the music with it I dunno. At this point, just by reading it, I dont know if they go along with the rest of the write, but with music they might work.

    I think the two stanzas after the first chorus carried alot of strength.

    Well done.

    | Posted on 2006-06-29 00:00:00 | by hyproglo | [ Reply to This ]
      This is very well done
    There is definately a rhythem you created with your words
    To me you are describing the life of a drug addicted teen and how this addiction causess many highs and lows to the point where they dont even remember what a normal reaction is anymore
    Like I said though
    And this is no lie
    This is very well written And I would Love to hear this write matched with music
    someone like
    No Use For A Name
    Or
    Lagwagon
    God Bless
    Ron

    Please if you get a chance Please take a look at some of my writes and let me know what you think
    Thank You
    Ron
    | Posted on 2006-06-29 00:00:00 | by Ronswords | [ Reply to This ]
      Hey cool lyrics. I did what Dave did, and it carried itself bloody well.

    It's not often lyrics can hold their head way up, because it's so hard to invisage the melody and rhythm that the writer had in mind, but in this case it stands on its own as a poem as well, so it's very good indeed.

    Great stuff about life in the fucked-up fast lane, I enjoyed this immensely! Well done!

    be happy

    Graeme
    | Posted on 2006-07-03 00:00:00 | by wewak11 | [ Reply to This ]


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    108947

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.


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