[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav

  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav

    << | >>

    dots Submission Name: Sane Asylumdots

    Author: giventofly
    ASL Info:    19/M/Seattle, Washington
    Elite Ratio:    5.22 - 74/75/27
    Words: 131
    Class/Type: Poetry/Serious
    Total Views: 1076
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 874

       I always wondered what the most mentally ill people would say were they able to articulate exactly what their condition was like and how it felt be seen as they were.

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsSane Asylumdots

    Donít glare at me
    Iím a sick depraved man
    I stand alone
    With my devolution
    To take me under.
    I wish it wasnít me,
    I die alone
    On fields of fear
    I graze.
    Please try to understand
    Who I am and why.
    Give me the pleasure
    Of destroying the
    Lies. Take this away.
    Take it where the sun
    Can die and no oneís harmed.
    Sweating in the sheets
    And awakening to screams
    Can get old after a while.
    I wonder who will
    Give me my soul today.
    The bread I devour
    Is flesh from the
    hands of divine.
    The stars were never
    Aligned for my sanity.
    When the sickness
    Weighs a ton, who
    Should I run to?
    Why is the Devil
    My bunkmate?
    Öand are the heavens
    like Hollywood?

    Submitted on 2006-07-03 01:39:07     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
    Interesting, yes. Ir seems insanity or the paranormal is becoming a much-discussed topic. I'm wondering though... I know you said IF mentally ill people were able to communicate... but I supposeif they were, would that be the basis for more 'mercy killings'? I shudder to think.

    Please try to understand
    Who I am and why.

    I don't know why, but I don't like those lines... I really don't know. I think that telling us the thoughts of a mentally retarded person is just too presumptuous... you know? Truth is, no one will ever know what goes on in their minds... it's a secret. If we knew...

    A mentally retarded person would not have the rationality to discern between himself and others... he wouldn't have the rationality to carry a thought through. So I guess your piece is a paradox... an interesting one none the less, since you explore a 'what if' concept.

    'Are the heavens like Hollywood?'

    | Posted on 2006-07-03 00:00:00 | by shana | [ Reply to This ]
      This poem is nicely written. I enjoyed it and I like the concept expressed. Mentally insane, what would they think and express if they could? I think this poem gives a good grasp of that, then again, maybe it could not. That's what I like about this poem, or poems in this topic. The possibilities able to be expressed are endless for in the eyes of the insane shines a different and unexplainable world of magic, or caos. Over all good job and keep up the good work!
    | Posted on 2006-07-03 00:00:00 | by TenshiKage | [ Reply to This ]
      interesting write, im intrigued truly. I'll have to start out by admitting that i did not read your comments bfore i read the poem, so i thought it was your view of the world, as an allegedly sane person, but feeling like u've been trapped into an asylum, that is the world. it works out fine the way you said it, but i'm goin to analyse it the way i saw it.
    so. it's interesting to see howu have percieved the insane to think. thinking themselves to be fine, until the world tells them otherwise. this, however is oftentimes the way many people feel-"normal people". trapped in a plastic world of relationships, lies and inner torture of intentions and motivations. wanting to be understood, and wanting to be free from their bindings--the bondage weighed upon us by society. and after all, aren't we all a bit insane? and don't we all feel pressured by society into a confused imprisoned life, where we wonder and wallop and get told what to do?
    anyhow, gud write
    | Posted on 2006-07-03 00:00:00 | by beninbrasil | [ Reply to This ]
      wow...this is interesting....I have always religion was in insanity some how. I mean chrisianity encourages canabalism and vampirism....if only in symbolism. but anyway. I think this is intriuging. I mean what would a crazy person say if they could....if we could understand it. Things about demons and the things out of our nightmares. I mean the most criminally insane people claim that god told them to do it. maybe our gods are vengful and are really using them. wouldn't that be a trip? any way i wanted to say i liked this and will think on it more.
    | Posted on 2006-07-03 00:00:00 | by Briannan | [ Reply to This ]

    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?


    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.




    User Name:


    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]

    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]

    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]