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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Rise Againdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: iluvpoetry_1
    Elite Ratio:    2.87 - 806/439/119
    Words: 149
    Class/Type: Poetry/Depressed
    Total Views: 1110
    Average Vote:    4.0000
    Bytes: 837



    Description:
       ok im goin 2 try and do this the whole poem is something i wrote in agust of 2005 except da last stanza or w/e da positive thing! i dunno if its gonna fit so u can tell me and be honest! BRUTALLY HONEST!!!
    ~akaila~
    and i cant spell so calm down!
    um... ok i completly didnt follow my notebook bcz as i was typing i didnt like it no more!! ok well im not its not like yall is gonna read this anyway!!! um is this depressing or longingum..... crap..... i really dont understand da diffrence cuz its like most of da time when ur longing for something that something can make u depressed but that could just be me!! hey wat da hell depression!


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsRise Againdots
    -------------------------------------------


    Head spinning with pain
    Trying hard not to cry
    But the tears keep streming down my eyes

    The pain is sepping into my soul
    Sick of the pain. Weak, drowning in the rain.
    Trying hard to make it through this life. Of stress pain and lies.

    I'm trapt behing this door.
    That will never poen. Surrounded my darkness. Lost beneath the cracks.

    This is how I felt when I was to blind to see
    what was surrounding me. I was slowly breaking down. Deeper and deeper into a depression that was my own fault.

    Being angry and the world but the only person I was truly mad at was me. For hurting those who love me.

    I have to bring myself out of this shell that has completly surrounded me. I just begin and love me for me!




    Submitted on 2006-07-03 12:55:49     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      I like the relazation of true anger within your poem. The descriptions are very good. But what really distracts is your typing mistakes and your spelling. I think you should really revise this. But I like the jaggedness of this poem, it gives it character. The anger and frustration shows through in the format of the peom...
    | Posted on 2006-07-03 00:00:00 | by Jakirina | [ Reply to This ]
      That was good, I 'felt' the anger that was there and realization. I mean, I can relate to it too. The third little paragraph showed how it was, like, confusing and realizing what was happening.
    | Posted on 2006-07-03 00:00:00 | by Foreseer | [ Reply to This ]


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    January 10 07
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