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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: I should mentiondots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: maninthemirror
    ASL Info:    17/m/arkansas
    Elite Ratio:    2.64 - 224/318/109
    Words: 244
    Class/Type: Lyrics/Misc
    Total Views: 812
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1561



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsI should mentiondots
    -------------------------------------------


    yo' all the things that you say to me/
    a lie, who woulda thought/
    that I find out that you playin me/
    just now, this brought/
    to my attention/
    I should probably mention/

    I know bout what you did, I think that shit's fucked up/
    especially after tellin' me, we ain't gonn stay broke up/
    but why can't you be real wit me/
    I was always real wit you/
    when you said " please never lie to me"/
    I always told the truth/

    yo' all the things that you say to me/
    a lie, who woulda thought/
    that I find out that you playin me/
    just now, this brought/
    to my attention/
    I should probably mention/


    check it out, I love you, and. aint nothing gonna change that/
    because you my first lotta things, no better way to explain that/
    but sometimes I just think that what you do hurts/
    not because you know no better but you want me to feel worse/
    I know that aint logical, no reason involved/
    but since I found out you played me, my logic dissolved/
    or rather evolved/
    into straight bitterness and fear/
    hope everybody aint like you, but theres alot of people here/


    yo' all the things that you say to me/
    a lie, who woulda thought/
    that I find out that you playin me/
    just now, this brought/
    to my attention/
    I should probably mention/







    Submitted on 2006-07-09 02:00:08     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      hey bubz, this was kool, i kno where ur cummin from with this too, this is definatly one of ur strongest writes, luvin it,
    keep em cummin
    kyrenia
    | Posted on 2006-07-09 00:00:00 | by secret kisses | [ Reply to This ]
      miss me? lol anyways this was good idk it made my heart..idk have this feeling. This was very well written and it was one out of many of your good ones. So i'ma add this to my favs.

    much luv,
    Lady D
    | Posted on 2006-07-14 00:00:00 | by Poeticprincess | [ Reply to This ]
      the hook was alright it just seemed like u cut off the ending like there should be more after "I should probably mention". the verses were good even though they were short as [censored]
    | Posted on 2006-07-16 00:00:00 | by unknown soldier | [ Reply to This ]
      awww i liked it. it was sad, yet meaningful. tells everyone what your feeling and how you feel about it.

    Kimmy
    | Posted on 2006-07-21 00:00:00 | by Kimmy | [ Reply to This ]
      This was really good J. I also thought that this is one of ur better pieces that u have written. N-E- ways don't really have much to say bout it in terms of anythin except that I liked it. Keep it up and latrez.

    Angel
    | Posted on 2006-07-11 00:00:00 | by ForsakenAngel | [ Reply to This ]
      I like that a lot.
    The way you word stuff... it's like you're just having a normal (yet very strong) conversation, you know? I love it.
    The rhyming is fan-f*cking-tastic too.

    "especially after tellin' me, we ain't gonn stay broke up"

    I know it probably shouldn't have, but that line made me sad. lol I'm very sensitive, these days.

    Anywho, I think the whole thing is awesome (Yes, just like you ).
    You express yourself wonderfully.

    I'm a fan.

    -nikkki
    | Posted on 2006-07-11 00:00:00 | by Liv2LoveThePain | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

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    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

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