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My angel, my love We live so far apart My angel, sweet dove You've flown away with my heart Unaware of what you fly with on your wings I lay here tonight To replay those scenes, Of joy we once had When my soul was content My heart was glad But now it's rent I smile now While everyone is here My angel come back While my eyes tear |
wow I love your writing not every one can rhym in there poetry but youcan so nice job. I have read mmost of your writing now and I just wana tell you its some of the best ive read. and Ill have more of my writing up soon. your comments are verry sweet thankyou.| Posted on 2006-07-28 00:00:00 | by allmine | [ Reply to This ] | Sorry, I haven't gotten a chance to check out your work. | This is a sweet..piece. I like its flow. You never know if it is true love it will fly back to you someday. Good work. Love and Peace, lynn | Posted on 2006-07-27 00:00:00 | by lynn7 | [ Reply to This ] | Great stuff, the perfect portrait of a heartache. I like how you personified the dove and how she flew away with your heart on her wings. Very sad and somber, but what is love without pain? Nice job. | Jacob | Posted on 2006-07-12 00:00:00 | by Jacob Seibert | [ Reply to This ] | This is a good poem and has moved me very much! It reminds me of my own Love and it seems that you love somone who is far away from you at the moment that this was written. Wonderfully written and I loved. It has a very nice flowing sound to it and everything all seems to fit together. As if it was ment to written this exact way. What did you mean by rent though? | ~LocketzVc | Posted on 2006-08-20 00:00:00 | by LocketzVC | [ Reply to This ] | | ![]() | Posted on 2006-07-12 00:00:00 | by MyKemicalfailur | [ Reply to This ] | This is simply beautiful James and you really expressed emotion with this piece maybe you could have wrote the first part like this it would really sound better this way instead. | My angel, my love We share life apart My angel, sweet dove You've flown away with my heart Unaware of what you fly with on your wings you did write it beautifully and I enjoyed reading this very much will add to my favs Wilma | Posted on 2006-07-14 00:00:00 | by LadyMustang | [ Reply to This ] | Hey, I really loved this. I really loved the first part when you said: | My angel, my love We live life apart My angel, sweet dove You've flown away with my heart Unaware of what you fly with on your wings It was great..but what is reant? Anyway, you did a really good job on this. Kris | Posted on 2006-07-11 00:00:00 | by Raindrops | [ Reply to This ] | I've noticed that many of your poems are very similar. Understandable, as they all seem to be based on the same relationship the you clearly ponder quite a bit. I would suggest, though, to play with something different. Maybe more metaphorical, or even just write about something completely different. | Sometimes I come up with a line that seems to fit in no where, and I work on it until it becomes a poem. "Promises" was one such occurence, all I knew was I wanted to use the line "you wrote your promises across the sky". It doesn't have much relation to my real life, but it got me away from my own rut of writing about the same thing over and over. | Posted on 2006-08-17 00:00:00 | by freshcookies | [ Reply to This ] | I really like this one a lot | In this write you showed a wanting for a Love you Lost to return You captured the emotion of a lost love exceptionally well I get the feeling from your words this is not a complete loss I can definately feel the Love Never Give up until you are absolutely sure a Love has flown away as you say with the butterflys wimgs Brilliant work!!! God Bless Ron | Posted on 2006-07-18 00:00:00 | by Ronswords | [ Reply to This ] | Hmmm!! Let's see! overall pretty good to tell you the truth, but it seems to me that the line "we live life apart" should be re-thought because the words live and life are a little too similar and I don't feel that they go well together. I'm sure the poem is much better when read aloud, many people complain about a piece not having any rhythm, but poetry is like drumming sometimes you can have polyrhythms that seem out of place but in reality do make sense and are in perfect Rhythm when played in the case of drums and read in the case of poetry. | | Posted on 2006-07-12 00:00:00 | by Martin S. Allen | [ Reply to This ] | I lay here tonight | To replay those scenes, Of joy we once had When my soul was content My heart was glad But now it's reant I like this part, it something that we've all done just sat and though about the good things but then it just makes us feel like 10x worst. | Posted on 2006-07-11 00:00:00 | by Babykatty | [ Reply to This ] | |