Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Apple Piedots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: PastelSky
    ASL Info:    18/F/In the clouds
    Elite Ratio:    4.24 - 181/223/49
    Words: 142
    Class/Type: Poetry/Angry
    Total Views: 809
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1014



    Description:
       ....I was very angry at the time :D.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsApple Piedots
    -------------------------------------------


    Crackling Deceptive Engraging Inverno

    Crackle Crackle Crackle

    hate hate hate

    Stay away from my heart
    --the apple in my bossom--
    Treacherous Worm, rankling Snake!

    C h e w i n g...its way into my secrets
    C h e w i n g...its way into my world

    Easy now--easy.
    My chambers are quite dense.

    Bite Bite Bite

    hate hate hate

    So what did you find,
    my little pet?
    my goddamned devil,

    am I your filthy little Eve?

    Leak it all to me
    and tell Adam,
    tell GOD
    What you took from me
    and what secrets I hide

    release it to the world
    for all I goddamn care--
    chomp your way
    through my seething
    bloodstream!

    LO!
    What's this?

    No response,

    and no BITING?


    CRAP--my blood
    killed the snake!!




    Submitted on 2006-07-16 00:57:36     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    110848

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    To the King written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Cage written by distortedcloud
    Bam written by Daniel Barlow
    Stretto written by saartha
    Watch them Die written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Commencement written by Ramneet
    In the end written by Janesaddiction
    untitled written by Chelebel
    In the Mouth of Elysium written by HisNameIsNoMore
    The Last to Walk the Earth written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Love Can Be... written by HAVENSMITH92
    Genesis written by saartha
    In My Head written by faideddarkness
    Fathoms of the Lullaby Sea written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Date night written by expiring_touch
    Legends written by poetotoe
    May 31 2018 written by Chelebel
    On Loop written by Daniel Barlow
    To the Epilogue written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Faith In Line written by MyPeriodical
    The Search written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Blood to Plowshares written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Love and Solitaire written by HisNameIsNoMore
    ME written by jjd
    Unfortunate Reality written by TeslaKoyal
    The First Time written by Wolfwatching
    Hopelessly Blind written by ForgottenGraves
    Our Cinder Crisis written by SavedDragon
    Convergence written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Aftermath and Waltz written by HisNameIsNoMore

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry