Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Our Passion UnCageddots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: LadyMustang
    ASL Info:    42, female, West Virginia
    Elite Ratio:    4.19 - 222/171/71
    Words: 223
    Class/Type: Poetry/Passion
    Total Views: 1374
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1372



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsOur Passion UnCageddots
    -------------------------------------------


    " Our Passion UnCaged"

    My sweet Love if I should
    capture your lust at the days
    end, my desire would ride you
    like the wind.

    My wild heart pounding into
    this night, As our passion
    takes wings into flight.

    My love I long to feel you
    between my silky thighs,
    As your body's tempature
    rises to it's ultimate high.

    Take me as I am while our passion
    collides, I want to feel you deep
    within as our uncaged Passion
    gets heated As the storm of desire
    we ride.

    Just ravage me like a beast, I want
    to savor you an taste your body like
    a feast.

    Give to me the pleasure that I seek,
    As my soft hair slowly caresses your
    cheek.The soft touch of your embrace,
    makes me desire to stroke your secret
    place.

    As my senses smell your love's sweet
    perfume, Such a hunger for your love
    comes to me right here in your room.

    Take me and lay me on sheets of satin
    while loves volcano floods like cream, As
    your desire explodes within, You can here
    my sweet ecstasy scream.

    Written By: Wilma S. Hill
    copyright@2006 Ladymustang's Poetry




    Submitted on 2006-07-16 06:20:58     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      Very well written. I liked the rythm, and the form. I liked the words used in this, and I loved the quailty of this poem. The words were well used, and gave good imagery. Congrats on a well written peice of litature.

    Cami
    | Posted on 2006-07-16 00:00:00 | by camoflage | [ Reply to This ]
      Wow, I've been reading some of your work and I'm amazed at how simple and intense your passionate poems are. I love the fact that even if they're simple, they are so great and they make you feel so much! They're trully hot and passionate. This part: "Give to me the pleasure that I seek,
    As my soft hair slowly caresses your
    cheek." It seems so tender and sweet, which makes a bold contrast with what you say next: "The soft touch of your embrace,
    makes me desire to stroke your secret
    place." It surprised me, in a good way! Keep writting! You have a very sensual way of making passionate poems.
    | Posted on 2006-07-19 00:00:00 | by April0414 | [ Reply to This ]
      Nice images and a truly "hot" poem.

    You may want to check the spelling on here (hear?) loves (love's?)

    I was a bit thrown by the structure. The opening lines have a tight rhyme scheme that dissipates as the poem progresses. However than could be used as part of the metaphor and how things change as the passions heat up.


    Very nicely done.

    Chrystine
    | Posted on 2006-07-16 00:00:00 | by beatthedrum | [ Reply to This ]
      God this make me think my sex life sucks,But the words make this poem seem so vivid.The flow was also good.well written
    5 outta 5
    | Posted on 2006-07-16 00:00:00 | by Rainin_Raspbery | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    110859

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.


    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry