Waves of Pain by DiamondTears

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Submission Name: Waves of Pain dots

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Author:	DiamondTears
ASL Info:	16/F/Wa
Elite Ratio:	3.36 - 61/97/48
Words:	97

Class/Type:	Misc/Depressed
Total Views:	155
Average Vote:	No vote yet.
Bytes:	630

Description:
Footnote: Depression is real and it comes in waves, your fine then one minute then it comes back to swallow you whole.

Waves of Pain dots

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Coming in like waves on a shore
And leaving scares to heal
Just as they start to scab
It comes back for more
It whips us bloody, Shred our souls,
Picks us up and throws us down
Its symptoms take there tolls
Thoughts of suicide fog our minds
Pain that constantly blinds,
Then everything is ok again
Seems likes everything is over, Its time to begin,
Stability makes us normal
But then it roles back and stabs us true
We try to stay strong, our downfall formal,
Dried withered and broken
Our souls hallow and forgotten.

Submitted on 2006-07-19 21:09:44 Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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1: >_<
2: I dunno...
3: meh!
4: Pretty cool
5: Wow!

||| Comments |||
  It's very, very true.

Sometimes the waves hit slowly, or they seem to go away for awhile. Sometimes it just continues to hit, one, after another, after another, until you feel like you're going to go mad.

Obviously I can relate xD

Thanks~
-Kelsea
| Posted on 2007-01-21 00:00:00 | by Mieko | [ Reply to This ]
  This poem is so true. You are a very talented poet. I don't know why but a lot of people that have experienced a horrible wave of depression are really good writers or poets. I think the idea of waves of pain is so good and so extremely true. It hurts. Great job.

Alina
| Posted on 2006-07-20 00:00:00 | by luckyms20 | [ Reply to This ]
  Hi! I understand this poem extremely well. Specially, since I go through this every single day. It's all so true and realistic. This is my favorite part: "We try to stay strong, our downfall formal,
Dried withered and broken
Our souls hallow and forgotten."
Also, I think that to make the poem better, you could arrange it so it could have some kind of rhyme, which would make it awesome! The way you've described this is so true and accurate. Great write!
| Posted on 2006-07-19 00:00:00 | by April0414 | [ Reply to This ]
  Kinda sounds like you were heading on the right track, then at the end with
"We try to stay strong, our downfall formal,
Dried withered and broken
Our souls hallow and forgotten.", it kinda went off track for me. Just my opinion. But the idea of "waves of pain" is actually a good visual and its understandable for the most part. Great concept for a poem. I wonder though if you could go for more detail with it. Just a suggestion. Great job, keep up the good work.

Desser

| Posted on 2006-07-19 00:00:00 | by Desser | [ Reply to This ]
  This is an exceptionally written poem
I have experienced depression many times in life and know exactly of the feeling of hopelessness you are describing
One must look carefully at every negative and find the positive before they can enjoy life and live in happiness
I have gotten to the point where I can feel anothers negativity and stay away from it so it dosent interfere with my positive lifestyle
Please remain Positive
I will be Praying for you
God Bless
Ron

Please if you get a chance Please take a look at some of my writes and let me know what you think
Thank You
Ron
| Posted on 2006-07-20 00:00:00 | by Ronswords | [ Reply to This ]
  Hey there this is a pretty sweet poem it was very easy to understand and relate to. Yes it is true depression does seem to creep up on you right when you are on cloud nine and loving your life; failures, lost love, and just the stress of everyday life seems to sneak up. But remember no matter how unloved you feel remember that many times our feelings can easily decieve us.

much LOVE
JAmes

P.S. Check out some of my work you might like it:)
| Posted on 2006-07-22 00:00:00 | by James Reyna | [ Reply to This ]

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