This site will self destruct in 2 months, March 17.
It will come back, and be familiar and at the same time completely different.
All content will be deleted. Backup anything important.
--- Staff
Roleplay Cloud -

Sign up to EliteSkills

Already have an account? Login to Roleplay.Cloud
Forgot password? Recover Password

True Love

Author: od9.1.04
ASL Info:    15/f/oh
Elite Ratio:    1.68 - 18 /38 /19
Words: 210
Class/Type: Poetry /Death
Total Views: 890
Average Vote:    No vote yet.
Bytes: 1251


True Love

Laying against you
Feeling the raising of your chest
Knowing tht you’re leaving soon
It’s making me lose rest
Wat will I do when you leave me
Wat with my life hold
Is she better than me
Cuz I no about your acts so cold
How many nites do you leave
Out wat door do you sneak
I see the make-up on your sleave
Your secret is about to leak
I wonder why I stay with you
Why I torture myself so
You make me sad my insides blue
Inside you know
That you shatter my fragile heart
You rip up the seams
Rip it all apart
Tore up our hopes and dreams
Im down to my last thread
Im reachin for the blade
Thoughts of happiness thoughts of dread
So many thoughts altho my mind is made
I start to push deep
Spinning is my head
You lay there fast asleep
In my blood covered bed
When you wake
Ill be there no more
Ill b with you the last breath I take
Who knew with you wat I had instore
You should have thot about the way you left me
The way you made me feel
I guess you’ll never see
How you never helped me heal

Submitted on 2006-07-23 11:41:02     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
Edit post

Rate This Submission

1: >_<
2: I dunno...
3: meh!
4: Pretty cool
5: Wow!


  its interesting how the poem changed feeling from beginning to middle to end. i don't know if this is what was intended but thats what i got from it and i liked the way it flowed into the end.
| Posted on 2006-07-24 00:00:00 | by chottooni | [ Reply to This ]

Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

1. Be honest.
2. Try not to give only compliments.
3. How did it make you feel?
4. Why did it make you feel that way?
5. Which parts?
6. What distracted from the piece?
7. What was unclear?
8. What does it remind you of?
9. How could it be improved?
10. What would you have done differently?
11. What was your interpretation of it?
12. Does it feel original?