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    dots Submission Name: ** Escapedots

    Author: Caotic_Disaster
    ASL Info:    16/F/Canada
    Elite Ratio:    4.03 - 447/349/148
    Words: 61
    Class/Type: Poetry/
    Total Views: 852
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 413


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    dots** Escapedots

    I can't stay here
    I need to escape
    I need to run
    Free of your power
    Into the night sky
    Towards the setting sun
    Where happiness is around the corner
    Or over the rainbow
    And dive into the glittering pool waiting
    But when I return
    The madness won't be over
    But I'll have to stay here since
    I can't escape forever

    Submitted on 2006-07-24 16:24:37     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
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    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
      oo this was a very exiting poem i must say. It seems to get more and more tense UNTILL!!! i cant escape forever. breathtaking dear truley. keep writing

    | Posted on 2006-07-27 00:00:00 | by Mr. Creep | [ Reply to This ]
      i love the last two lines. so much.

    thanks for you comment. I agree. mine seems like 2 poems horribly stuck together. thanks for your input.
    | Posted on 2006-09-01 00:00:00 | by hush | [ Reply to This ]
      That last line was EPIC!

    Now, just a thought, but in my feable mind, if you changed the line before it to: "And even as I run from here I know"

    Or something like that. Sorry if you feel I just footstomped on your creative mind, but to me it just reads better like that and gives it a more friggin in your face ending.

    Nonetheless, your write was short and very self explanatory. Good job with it and thanks for sharing.
    | Posted on 2006-07-24 00:00:00 | by hyproglo | [ Reply to This ]
      "And dive into the glittering pool waiting"

    That is one of the prettiest lines I've ever read. I love that.

    And I like the rest of it too
    The whole idea of escaping but knowing you have to go back (if thats even what you were going for lol) is awesome.

    I can give you nothing but compliments.

    Very nicely done
    | Posted on 2006-07-24 00:00:00 | by Liv2LoveThePain | [ Reply to This ]

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