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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Viva Chernobyldots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Swanne
    Elite Ratio:    4.31 - 258/206/43
    Words: 491
    Class/Type: Poetry/Serious
    Total Views: 201
    Average Vote:    5.0000
    Bytes: 2897



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsViva Chernobyldots
    -------------------------------------------


    On April 26, 1986 ( I was one year young) a series of explosions destroyed in the building that housed something called Energy Block # 4 of the Chernobyl Nuclear Power Station. The catastrophe at Chernobyl became the largest technological disaster of the twentieth century. As a result of the perpetual presence of small doses of radiation, the number of people with cancer, mental retardation, neurological disorders and genetic mutations increase with each year. Among the demographic factors responsible for the depopulation of Belarus (the shortest route between Moscow and the polish border), radiation is number one. In Gomel and Mogilev regions, which suffered the most from Chernobyl, a mortality rate exceeds birth by 20%.

    ”Chernobyl”- Belaruska entsiklopedia

    Viva Chernobyl

    Such power,
    we brandish
    Lulling on,
    only our finger tips
    We wrap it around
    our dreams,
    of giant machines and uranium
    a breeze blows in
    knowing ,
    singing,
    false securities
    for we have already tried to
    harness its untamable energy
    with blades of metal
    they swing ominously
    in the fields across the horizon

    we pretend,
    not to be pretentious
    as the other foot drops
    like the dirty rain
    a simple mistake,
    an arrogant assumption.
    Save us,
    Save us from this.
    So this is the time
    We close our blind eyes
    Because we cannot hide
    From the pungent air we breathe
    Something is trying to burn us inside
    And we must have felt it
    The modest soil shudder
    Under the weight of what has become

    We learn,
    So very well
    We snub,
    The people whose skin
    Dissolved like ash
    The beautiful babies born
    To suffer
    To surrender.
    We drink merlot
    Like we drink our gasoline
    Push water around
    With wheels and walls
    And live shrouded in light
    We thrive still one our
    Brilliant machines
    Our little bullets
    Waiting,
    Rusting,
    In the cold chamber.




    Nuclear power plants provide about 17 percent of the world's electricity. Some countries depend more on nuclear power for electricity than others. In France, for instance, about 75 percent of the electricity is generated from nuclear power, according to the International Atomic Energy Agency. In the United States, nuclear power supplies about 15 percent of the electricity overall, but some states get more power from nuclear plants than others. There are more than 400 nuclear power plants around the world, with more than 100 in the United States.




    Submitted on 2006-07-25 20:30:43     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      Hi my friend,

    I have been away for a while. not away, physically, just my mind has not been working right. I havent touched my book for a cpuple of months and no new poetry has come into my head, but I wait and wait.

    I am so pleased to have a friend like you who thinks about me even when I have been gone so long.

    I love this piece about Chernobyl. The intro was perfect and the information about nuclear power is a nice touch at the end.

    Bullets waiting in the cold chamber is a very powerful line to end a very powerful work of art.

    As always, you amaze me with your ability to paint with words.

    Donn
    | Posted on 2006-08-01 00:00:00 | by D McDaniel | [ Reply to This ]
      I had a friend who was stationed in Chernoby when they had that melt down. She was in the army at the time. She got cancer from it and when she came home all her hair had fallen out and she had to where a bandana all the time or people would make fun of her . I remember how sad I was and wished that Nuclear power had never been invented! The world uses it to make bombs and to power its cities... but couldn't we have found a safer way to do it?
    Thanks For sharring this with us. It will make everyone think , I hope?
    Kelley Frost
    | Posted on 2006-07-26 00:00:00 | by whendt | [ Reply to This ]
      OVERALL A REALLY GOOD EFFORT. I’M NOT A FAN OF NUCLEAR ENERGY EITHER (ONE OF OUR LOVELY PRESIDENT’S ANSWERS TO THE OIL CRUNCH – ‘LET’S MAKE POLLUTION THAT LASTS MILLENNIA!’. ANYWAY, SOME VERY MINOR SUGGESTIONS. I THINK THE END MIGHT BE A BIT STRONGER TOO. OVERALL REALLY GOOD WORK FROM YOU. FEEL FREE TO TAKE OR LEAVE MY SUGGESTIONS, BTW.

    Viva Chernobyl! – ‘!’ AT END; THIS IS AN EXCLAMATION ISN’T IT?

    Such power – NO COMMA
    we brandish
    Lulling on,
    only our finger tips
    We wrap it around
    our dreams,
    of giant machines and uranium
    breeze blows in – DELETE ‘A’
    knowing – DELETE COMMA
    singing – DELETE COMMA
    false securities
    for we have already tried to
    harness its untamable energy – HOW ABOUT ‘HARNESS THE UNTAMABLE’?
    with blades of metal
    they swing ominously
    in the fields across the horizon

    we pretend – DELETE COMMA
    not to be pretentious
    as the other foot drops
    like the dirty rain
    a simple mistake,
    arrogant assumption. – DELETE ‘AN’
    Save us,
    Save us from this.
    So this is the time
    We close our blind eyes
    Because we cannot hide
    From pungent air – DELETE ‘THE’, ‘WE BREATHE’
    Something tries to burn us inside – MAYBE JUST ‘TRIES’?
    we must have felt it – DELETE ‘AND’
    The modest soil shudder
    Under the weight of what has become

    We learn,
    So very well
    We snub,
    The people whose skin
    Dissolved like ash
    The beautiful babies born
    To suffer
    To surrender.
    We drink merlot
    Like we drink our gasoline
    Push water around
    With wheels and walls
    And live shrouded in light
    We thrive still one our
    Brilliant machines
    Our little bullets
    Waiting,
    Rusting,
    In the cold chamber.

    I THINK THE END COULD BE STRONGER HERE – MAYBE COMPARE THE REACTOR CHAMBER TO A WOMB?
    | Posted on 2006-07-26 00:00:00 | by joeyalphabet | [ Reply to This ]
      I'm glad I live in a country which has very staunch anti-nuclear views. For all the pros it has, the cons far outweigh everything. Where do all the spent rods go? To third world country's backyards where they're happy to take the money involved in keeping it there? Where the people don't know about it, much to their detriment? I'm ranting here, but solar and wind power has far more benefits than nuclear ever will.

    I have one nitpick: your capitalization or lack of at the start of some lines is noticeable. Either cap the start or decap everything-- but keep it consistent... unless you're wanting to present it in normal fashion. If you do, I would take a look at your punctuation to make this more streamlined. Just a little thing in terms of visual consistency. And shouldn't "fingertips" be one word?

    I like how you bookend this poem with a factual paragraph-- it lends it more detail and serves to give balance to your poem.

    Overall, a nice and thoughtful read. And do we learn from our mistakes? Sadly, it doesn't seem so...

    Peace,

    Jase
    | Posted on 2006-08-08 00:00:00 | by alteredlife | [ Reply to This ]



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