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    dots Submission Name: Who will love me now..dots

    Author: BloodyMary87
    ASL Info:    19/f/Al
    Elite Ratio:    2.99 - 24/22/11
    Words: 87
    Class/Type: Poetry/BrokenHeart
    Total Views: 1033
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 509

       This is based on a song by P.J.Harvey 'Who will love me now'
    Its a lovely sad song.

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsWho will love me now..dots

    I open my eyes to see you leaving me.
    In desperation I grab for you.
    And scream.

    Who will love me now?
    If you wont.
    Who will hold me ?
    If not you, than who?

    Who will ever love me?
    Like you did.
    So who will love me now?
    Who will tell me they love me.

    Who will bring me to life
    again, where you killed and buried me.

    Who will love me now?
    Tell me..
    Who will ever love me..

    Submitted on 2006-07-27 15:16:13     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    Rate This Submission

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    ||| Comments |||
      Hey there Mary this is a very heartfelt, beautiful and yet sad poem.... Sometimes when we have reached the end of a relationship that we have been in for a long time we get nervous and think that love will never be the same again. Just remember that tere is always someone that loves you and no mattere how down and depressed you feel God is always there for you.

    much LOVE
    | Posted on 2006-08-01 00:00:00 | by James Reyna | [ Reply to This ]
      ): Mary! Stop feeling this way. I know you can't help it, but it makes me sad. >: I wish you could be REALLY happy all the time. On the actual poem, I think it is very good, probably the best one that you have written. It is very raw and full of emotion, but I know why. You don't show your emotions very much to people's faces. It seems that the only time that you make them known is when you are all alone. Because you feel exactly that, all alone. All I can say is I LOVE YOU! :D
    Smile as much as you can. Hopefully it will be a little better when school starts and your mind isn't constantly on this.
    <3 LeAnna
    | Posted on 2006-07-27 00:00:00 | by RedRoseofBlood | [ Reply to This ]
      I liked this alot. I don't really have anything to say that would be of much use to you writing wise.

    But, in this you make it seem like the only reason you stayed with this person was because they loved you. You make it sound like you believed you could do no better. I liked it, but i just think you leaned more towards it sounding like the only reason you loved him is because you needed someone to love you.

    Great write. I look forward to seeing more,
    | Posted on 2006-07-27 00:00:00 | by camoflage | [ Reply to This ]
      Hmm. Interesting. I like it. (Adore PJ Harvey)
    "Who will bring me to life again, where you killed and buried me." Love that bit. Good write. Sorry I can't offer more by way of constructive criticism.
    | Posted on 2006-07-27 00:00:00 | by Abby Sinthetic | [ Reply to This ]
      full of tragedy and desperation... an immense sense of panic... read very well flowed nicley. i would always love more elaboration in works such as this. what made this persons love so providing for you? why the fear when they left? was thier love so unique there would not be hope for another?
    im in anticipation of your next piece..
    | Posted on 2006-07-27 00:00:00 | by blackhart | [ Reply to This ]

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