Description: This is in the vein of a lot of my other works, sorry.
He was always down,
but he never painted anything blue,
He danced around his melancholy subtly and beautifully.
To a casual observer his works never revealed his depression,
but if you lingered the absence of azure and indigo only made you think of blue, and the gloom became a vortex.
I like the subtle yet intricate way you weave this ,--it reflects the meaning of the poem itself. People put on social masks,--artists paint canvasses in seemingly rainbow bright expression--but most often it is what is NOT seen, that reveals the true message, the whole picture. This is just great Amy.
"He danced around his melancholy..." love that line! i'm not sure that i understand the last line, though, "and the gloom became a vortex." it doesn't seem to fit with the lines above it. but that's just me. i can imagine that a painting without blue in it would make you think "where's the blue?" it's such a basic kinda color.
this was good, i know you are talking about an artist, but im not sure which one, the only line i wasnt sure about was the last one, with that line it seems that there should be more added, it leaves me wondering where that vortex leads you, is it into the artists mind or where, that line just confused me a bit, but the rest of the poem was great my favorite lines has to be :
He danced around his melancholy Subtly and beautifully To a casual observer
I prefer writing sad poems when I'm sad but that's a great image you used here. some people just always pretend to be happy but when you have a secound look you could see that they're just wearing a mask. very well done.
It rather dances too - 'til the last line of punctuation and the reminder that what you see isn't always what you get. Munch would be able to comment... You sneaked that last line in under the radar - and it's effective that way. K
This tickles me right he...well, I'd better not show where. Might be accused of indecent exposure. I have a feeling that the present tense would make this even better and just a hint of rhyme could make it masterfull. Nonetheless a favourite. I'm just standing here waiting for inspiration and really envious of your work.