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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Mourning for Motherdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: elephantasia
    ASL Info:    37/F/UK
    Elite Ratio:    3.54 - 398/490/159
    Words: 201
    Class/Type: Poetry/Depressed
    Total Views: 696
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1386



    Description:
       Okay...never thought it would take 30 years to get round to mourning my mother's death! My inner child is in grieving.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsMourning for Motherdots
    -------------------------------------------


    Today I am the thunderous sky
    I'm raining into streaky rivers
    and pooling in my own misery
    as sadness clouds my heart
    and makes my limbs heavy.

    Running away is no longer an option
    for I saw her in all her glory
    traumatic reactions to her threatened world
    made my honesty stumble.
    Safety; survival; takes a higher criteria
    to a child whose mother abandoned her for death.

    Mother's arms were always safe
    and then mother's arms were gone.
    Almost three and her world was shattered.
    Almost three my soul was scattered and silenced.
    All the way from 33 to nearly 3
    to find me.

    To find me...

    Scared
    Unsafe
    Insecure
    and always looking
    to regain that which was lost.

    At nearly 3
    I learned that safety can evapourate
    like a smear of condescensation from a window pane.
    There was such pain buried in me.
    Such a loss creates
    Such a need
    Such a need creates
    Such limiting beliefs in a small childs head
    Such limiting beliefs run
    Such desparate behaviours
    Such desparate behaviours create
    Such havoc in my life.

    Have many layers of an onion must I peel
    before the tears stop?




    Submitted on 2006-07-30 08:35:47     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      it is hard to critique such a raw and painful write as this. losing your mother at the age of 3 must have been devastating, and to re-live it now, 30 years later, must be extremely painful.

    your opening lines allow us to feel that heaviness and sadness in your heart as you speak of the thunderous sky and the weight of the rain that pools into your heart and makes your limbs heavy with grief.

    we always have to go through the pain to get to the other side where the rainbow lies and healing happens. i wish for you peace in your heart..

    love,
    ~Cat
    | Posted on 2006-07-30 00:00:00 | by magnicat | [ Reply to This ]
      I agree that it's hard to critique something like this. I can't imagine what it's like to lose a mother when you were so young. It had to be really hard. I loved the closing line. I think the next to last stanza conveys the confusing emotions quite well. You opening is also very eloquent. This is very well done.

    Hugs,
    Amy
    | Posted on 2006-08-03 00:00:00 | by cuddledumplin | [ Reply to This ]


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