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the way we are

Author: bbcherry
Elite Ratio:    3.07 - 79 /34 /16
Words: 61
Class/Type: Poetry /
Total Views: 1233
Average Vote:    5.0000
Bytes: 362


the way we are

stuck in a moment
stuck in time
stuck in this world
this place, of mine

how did i get here?
when will i leave
my mind in wonder
sometimes in grieve

what was i made for
why is life this way
how do i open the door?
for a new life to play

Submitted on 2006-07-31 13:13:42     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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  U could use caps and grammar work (structure) but aside that I thought it was a great piece, very deep.
| Posted on 2006-10-21 00:00:00 | by mikepyro7 | [ Reply to This ]
  the meaing of life one thing we all come to cross some time in our life this is a great way of kind of descibing a way a mind would think of this problem seeing as it is question and no onw has an answer i think your approach on this was unique in a sence that i hve not seen any one do it in this way and i realy like the

' what was i made for
why is life this way
how do i open the door?
for a new life to play'

keep up the good work

Rak ^)
| Posted on 2006-08-11 00:00:00 | by dark figure | [ Reply to This ]
  this was a good poem. i liked the way you wrote it and how you used the rhyme. Joanna
| Posted on 2006-07-31 00:00:00 | by heartless_ | [ Reply to This ]
  I really like this one...The rhyme was good, and without a lack of rhythm. The way you wrote it is very nice. Good write, keep it up.
| Posted on 2006-07-31 00:00:00 | by chaos_bite | [ Reply to This ]
  i like it. but l'd put in caps like she said. and good use of question marks and commas!!!
| Posted on 2006-07-31 00:00:00 | by butterflygirl27 | [ Reply to This ]
  It's great! You might want to put in some capitals though. Otherwise, I loved it!
| Posted on 2006-07-31 00:00:00 | by Pirate | [ Reply to This ]

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