Sign up to EliteSkills




Already have an account? Login to Roleplay.Cloud
Forgot password? Recover Password

Just Promise Me


Author: Toxic Rose
Elite Ratio:    5.82 - 159 /220 /97
Words: 126
Class/Type: Poetry /Love
Total Views: 881
Average Vote:    No vote yet.
Bytes: 853



Description:


Mem'ries...


Just Promise Me



Seasons have passed, the tide has gone
The wind blows somewhere far away
Green blade withers 'neath a scorning sun
Since I left you there, alone to stay.

The love we share shall never slow,
As perpetual as the churning sea
If tomorrow never comes, just know-
Someday, somehow, I will return to thee.

By starlight borrowed and moonlight strung,
I bring these sorrowful tidings to you-
Yet more time will pass, but mem'ries shall last,
But promise me, love, you will always be true.

Promise me the world-
Promise methe stars.
Promise that you'll never leave me
Alone in the dark.
Just promise me one thing-
That all you say is true
Promise me your love-
That's all I ask of you.




Submitted on 2006-08-02 00:21:37     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
Edit post

Rate This Submission

1: >_<
2: I dunno...
3: meh!
4: Pretty cool
5: Wow!




Comments


  This poem made me feel relaxed and the flow was really nice. It sounds good when read out loud. I can imagine reading this in a book or, dare I say it, on a gravestone! Lovely, really lovely. Mel.
| Posted on 2006-08-02 00:00:00 | by litllost | [ Reply to This ]
  well i don't want for your first comment to be negative, but there needs to be a space between me and the in the final stanza.

other than that, i thought this was a very fluid piece, if not moving. the image i recieved was this maidien of light standing midst the fields of sorrow and flowers of morning song, with her hands outstretched to that someone, pouring out emotion. as she cried, her tears carried by the wind to fall upon their cheek...

just a glimpse, but like i said i felt that this was a quite fluid piece, and i do look forward to hearing more of your poetry.

merry meet and blessed be
Loquacious Mind
| Posted on 2006-08-02 00:00:00 | by Loquacious Mind | [ Reply to This ]


Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

1. Be honest.
2. Try not to give only compliments.
3. How did it make you feel?
4. Why did it make you feel that way?
5. Which parts?
6. What distracted from the piece?
7. What was unclear?
8. What does it remind you of?
9. How could it be improved?
10. What would you have done differently?
11. What was your interpretation of it?
12. Does it feel original?



113002