Description: Just a true story of the other night...I still haven't got over it. It hurts ok so if you're gonna call me a bitch and whine at me fuck off I'm looking for someone to relate not a fucking lecturer. Oh and Roxxi if you read this I still like you and maybe with enough apology I could like them but at the moment.....not gonna happen!
Just a story of the other night -------------------------------------------
OK first of all I'll set the scene by saying I'm a clinical depressive with confidence issues.
Last night I was on the internet to a friend who had 15 girl friends 'round with her. I spoke to all of them for about five mins then the next one would come on. I asked my friend at the end if I had any fans and she said yes two. At this moment my heart jumped, this was the first time in ages that I felt good about myself. So I say Oh cool can I talk to them, to which her response was
"No they're busy fucking Jon"
Obviously this ripped my hopes in two and ripped my self confidence even smaller. If it wasn't for Crystal I honestly think I would have killed myself. For the first time in two years I cried. So later my friend says the others said she should talk to me and I said why is everybodyelse fucking Jon and she just says yes. So one of the girls comes back and i go i thought you were fucking Jon and she just says Done. So I told her how I felt and she (and the rest of them) felt really terrible for the rest of the night and the next morning. Even though I said I frgave them I don't.....I hate them with every ounce of my being, they built up my hopes to destroy them again. I hope they get fat and noone loves them ever because thats what I feel they deserve (except Roxxi I hold no ill will toward her she's still my friend)