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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Cry, Cry, Babydots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: slntfirflm
    ASL Info:    26/F/CA
    Elite Ratio:    5.76 - 301/331/93
    Words: 82
    Class/Type: Poetry/Misc
    Total Views: 840
    Average Vote:    4.0000
    Bytes: 521



    Description:
       My mom and I both had did view points of my poem. So what do you think? Ill put the TYPE it is after I get a few comments.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsCry, Cry, Babydots
    -------------------------------------------


    Cry, Cry, Baby
    I'll wipe away your blessed tears;
    and lead you away from all such speeding cars.
    Listen to your dreams
    and the violins to tell you of some nonsense.
    I tell you, its all a lie.

    Paddle your way out that lonely rift,
    and into that mere traffic.
    Not pain, but a vision.
    I swear to you its everything you think.

    Cry, Cry, Baby
    you were right all along;
    and being up here with you
    is pure merriment.




    Submitted on 2006-08-07 13:21:08     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      This is really quite beautiful
    To me in this write you are speaking of how Life isnt easy and one has to venture out into the World to make a life of their own but their Mother or another Loved one will always be there to lift them up when their down
    And you also speak of how even death cannot break the Bonds of Love created by a beautiful Family
    God Bless
    Your Friend
    Ron

    Please keep in touch its been awhile since Ive heard from you I hope you are doing ok
    God Bless
    Ron
    | Posted on 2006-08-10 00:00:00 | by Ronswords | [ Reply to This ]
      I would like to know what your mom thought of thins poem because it's title is the same as a Janis Joplin song. Granted they are not alike in any sence but someone into Janis such as myself reads this poem with a false sence. You might want to change the title but other than that it's a very good write. This is the poem of yours that I have read but I will make sure to read more when I have the time if you do the same. Good write, again.
    Kisses
    Ashlee Jane
    | Posted on 2006-08-08 00:00:00 | by ashlee_jane2003 | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

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