another minute by blackhart

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dots

<< | >>

Submission Name: another minute dots

--------------------------------------------------------

Author:	blackhart
ASL Info:	26 male
Elite Ratio:	2.77 - 65/63/56
Words:	122

Class/Type:	Misc/Misc
Total Views:	865
Average Vote:	No vote yet.
Bytes:	833

Description:

another minute dots

-------------------------------------------

just another minute please
the stench of regurgitated air
rancid meat and decay
let me savour it
relish in its putrid aura

tender is the meat and dry
you could mutilate it with your own hands
succulent and abominable
my face grows numb with anticipation

to add another to this collection
an honor
my duty fulfilled till nights come again
permanently etched.. happy?

i pour the first drink
tonights celebration
ill be enebriated in pride
a job well done

the decantur passed on from generations
a legion of honourables past
an in numerable gaze
i ponder the vastness of a collective work

and smile
yes its truly a gift!

Submitted on 2006-08-07 16:38:59 Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

1: >_<
2: I dunno...
3: meh!
4: Pretty cool
5: Wow!

||| Comments |||
This probably sounds silly but the image I get from this poem is of a guy who used to work in a butchershop or meat factory or somethin' but that he ACTUALLY liked workin' there. And then havin' a drink afterwards with colleagues but it sounds like he's leaving and he's going to miss it... one more minute please. Sorry for the non-constructive comment.
Take care B!

Ginny
| Posted on 2006-08-12 00:00:00 | by LadyMerlina | [ Reply to This ]

Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

1. Be honest.
2. Try not to give only compliments.
3. How did it make you feel?
4. Why did it make you feel that way?
5. Which parts?
6. What distracted from the piece? 7. What was unclear?
8. What does it remind you of?
9. How could it be improved?
10. What would you have done differently?
11. What was your interpretation of it?
12. Does it feel original?

113547

Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

Enter your search terms Submit search form

Web www.eliteskills.com

[ Quick Signup ]
[ Lost Password ]

January 10 07
131,497 Poems
Posted

I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

[ Angst Poetry ]
[ Cutters ]
[ Famous Poetry ]
[ Poetry Scams ]

FontSize:
[ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]

Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3 It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
It means a lot to them, as it does to you.