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    dots Submission Name: Dreaming of what is, not of what is not.dots

    Author: vintagepepper
    ASL Info:    21/F/OH
    Elite Ratio:    7.05 - 191/153/46
    Words: 76
    Class/Type: Poetry/
    Total Views: 791
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 483


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    dotsDreaming of what is, not of what is not.dots

    this little corner of the world is shadowed,
    if you lie very still,in the gloom, you can feel yourself exist;
    feel the rise and fall within, rushing through your veins.
    hear the beat of your conscience incessantly,
    lapping the rocky shores of your id.
    it is a constant battle -- primal lust against fidelity.
    nothing is ever silent,
    nothing is ever calm.
    everywhere is where you want to be.
    ...anywhere else but here.

    Submitted on 2006-08-11 08:06:03     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      Short and biting! A scream of unhappiness, it causes this reader to feel your pain, to feel your isolation and sadness. Inner peace and happiness should belong to all. When I read such unhappy thoughts it causes me pain. I hope you are alright. I have found through the years that a change of venue, does nothing to relieve the unhappiness. It is all in how you approach life, it is attitude. No one and nothing can make you cry, if you have hope. Well I think I'm preaching and not reviewing, sorry. Did see a few typos; "melancholy, conscience, else". But thats all I would change, elsewise, it is very engrossing and I loved these two bits:

    "rocky shores of your id"


    "feel yourself exist."

    Liked 'em 'cause their new and different, always lookin for the originality of the artist. Enjoyed this.

    | Posted on 2006-08-11 00:00:00 | by phil askew | [ Reply to This ]

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    January 10 07
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