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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Waitingdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Liv2LoveThePain
    ASL Info:    19 - F - Philly
    Elite Ratio:    4.23 - 1527/1515/256
    Words: 354
    Class/Type: Poetry/Misc
    Total Views: 1572
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 2361



    Description:
       I don't specifically say what the person is waiting for on purpose. Use your imagination.
    Sorry it's so long.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsWaitingdots
    -------------------------------------------


    I've never been the patient one.
    These restless, shaking hands
    multiply my violent ways
    and act out all my plans.

    Waiting is the source of all
    bad things I have done.
    Although I feel so hollow now,
    the thoughts must way a ton.

    I'm such a sucker for a plague,
    a tragedy or scar.
    A walk along the glossy edge
    won't take me very far.

    So as I sit here in this chair,
    your face cuts through my mind.
    I smile at the innocence
    this heart will never find.

    Maybe Cupid shot me once.
    That fucker always wins.
    But now I'm living for the curse
    and dressing up in sins.

    My heart is piercing through my chest.
    It isn't worth the wait.
    The longer I am left alone,
    the more I fill with hate.

    I cannot sit here anymore.
    I grab the rubber gloves,
    and walk the distance to your house
    to prove that I'm "in love."

    Cutting through the window's screen
    with a knife I brought from home,
    I see you standing casually;
    one ear against the phone.

    At least you haven't noticed me.
    I'm glad you're occupied.
    It gives me time to enter, but
    no time for you to hide.

    I climb in through the hole I made
    and stand behind your back.
    I'd kill to watch you fall. My love,
    lets dye the moment black.

    Senses finally start to work,
    and as you turn around,
    my knife decides to meet your chest
    with such a lovely sound.

    You drop the phone. It hit's the floor
    next to where you lay.
    I pick it up. "He'll call you back,"
    is all I have to say.

    Carving words into your face,
    dead skin becomes a page.
    It almost makes me feel alive,
    as if you are my stage.

    The starless sky is empty now,
    resembling your eyes.
    And as I walk back home, I say,
    "I warned you, love. Good-bye."

    I'll never be the patient one.
    Again, these restless hands
    multiplied my violent ways
    and acted out my plans.




    Submitted on 2006-08-11 21:08:59     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      first, what is with the comment that was given like a million times. ya know the same comment from the same person...weird. anyway, second, all i can say is that this was another great poem from you and i would say alot mre but i cant give long commment these days because i have to use other ppls computers. but i thought it was really good and hopefully ill be able t say more on other poems when i have time.
    | Posted on 2006-08-13 00:00:00 | by LoveToHateMe | [ Reply to This ]
      Tears, I have tears; it's so beautiful! I'm so Proud of you!!! I couldn't be more happy if my own son wrote it(actaully that would kinda worry me, considering he's 2 and all, amongst other things, anyways)I feel so proud, and I'm not sure why? Is that strange? To be more proud of you than I've been of myself? Whatever, irrelovent. I actaully expected you to say the words that you carved, kinda like when you carved them; that would have been mad chill! But it is none the less. It deffinately ties in with other ones you've done. You know if i read in the paper about a string of murders in Philly, well I wont say a word; I'll just have that much more reason to be proud(and not to piss you off). You know what they say; "idol hands are the devils workshop!"
    | Posted on 2006-08-12 00:00:00 | by dismentled | [ Reply to This ]
      Tears, I have tears; it's so beautiful! I'm so Proud of you!!! I couldn't be more happy if my own son wrote it(actaully that would kinda worry me, considering he's 2 and all, amongst other things, anyways)I feel so proud, and I'm not sure why? Is that strange? To be more proud of you than I've been of myself? Whatever, irrelovent. I actaully expected you to say the words that you carved, kinda like when you carved them; that would have been mad chill! But it is none the less. It deffinately ties in with other ones you've done. You know if i read in the paper about a string of murders in Philly, well I wont say a word; I'll just have that much more reason to be proud(and not to piss you off). You know what they say; "idol hands are the devils workshop!"
    | Posted on 2006-08-12 00:00:00 | by dismentled | [ Reply to This ]
      Tears, I have tears; it's so beautiful! I'm so Proud of you!!! I couldn't be more happy if my own son wrote it(actaully that would kinda worry me, considering he's 2 and all, amongst other things, anyways)I feel so proud, and I'm not sure why? Is that strange? To be more proud of you than I've been of myself? Whatever, irrelovent. I actaully expected you to say the words that you carved, kinda like when you carved them; that would have been mad chill! But it is none the less. It deffinately ties in with other ones you've done. You know if i read in the paper about a string of murders in Philly, well I wont say a word; I'll just have that much more reason to be proud(and not to piss you off). You know what they say; "idol hands are the devils workshop!"
    | Posted on 2006-08-12 00:00:00 | by dismentled | [ Reply to This ]
      Tears, I have tears; it's so beautiful! I'm so Proud of you!!! I couldn't be more happy if my own son wrote it(actaully that would kinda worry me, considering he's 2 and all, amongst other things, anyways)I feel so proud, and I'm not sure why? Is that strange? To be more proud of you than I've been of myself? Whatever, irrelovent. I actaully expected you to say the words that you carved, kinda like when you carved them; that would have been mad chill! But it is none the less. It deffinately ties in with other ones you've done. You know if i read in the paper about a string of murders in Philly, well I wont say a word; I'll just have that much more reason to be proud(and not to piss you off). You know what they say; "idol hands are the devils workshop!"
    | Posted on 2006-08-12 00:00:00 | by dismentled | [ Reply to This ]
      Tears, I have tears; it's so beautiful! I'm so Proud of you!!! I couldn't be more happy if my own son wrote it(actaully that would kinda worry me, considering he's 2 and all, amongst other things, anyways)I feel so proud, and I'm not sure why? Is that strange? To be more proud of you than I've been of myself? Whatever, irrelovent. I actaully expected you to say the words that you carved, kinda like when you carved them; that would have been mad chill! But it is none the less. It deffinately ties in with other ones you've done. You know if i read in the paper about a string of murders in Philly, well I wont say a word; I'll just have that much more reason to be proud(and not to piss you off). You know what they say; "idol hands are the devils workshop!"
    | Posted on 2006-08-12 00:00:00 | by dismentled | [ Reply to This ]
      I read this poem like 5 times just so I could get a complete picture of each piece of this story, and each time it was a better read than before. I really enjoyed the details. I now know just how I am going to get even with that s.o who done me wrong.

    my fav lines:
    I climb in through the hole I made
    and stand behind your back.
    I'd kill to watch you fall. My love,
    lets dye the moment black


    great write

    llcollins
    | Posted on 2006-08-12 00:00:00 | by L.L.COLLINS | [ Reply to This ]
      holy [censored] hell. this piece rocks!!
    i really like the way this story plays out, first giving a slight warning of what happens when you're forced to wait and then seeing it acted out in actuality. awesome. and not only did i like the story but you did an good job in keeping the rythm of the piece throughout the whole thing. i always have a hard time with that so, kudos.
    well, can't seem to think of anything more to say on your piece.... but well, keep up the writing

    -jess
    | Posted on 2006-08-12 00:00:00 | by wildchild | [ Reply to This ]
      Well, I like it. Who hasn't fantasized about killing the [censored] that broke their heart? I don't really know what to say. It is quite original, and it paints a very vivid picture. This, for some reason, was my favorite part:

    Maybe Cupid shot me once.
    That [censored]er always wins.
    But now I'm living for the curse
    and dressing up in sins.
    | Posted on 2006-08-12 00:00:00 | by Raivn | [ Reply to This ]
      Umm you and i are cool right. I mean i havent offended you or kept you waiting or anything like that right. if i have i am sorry please dont carve words upon my chest (hahaha sometimes i think i am crazy) another awesome piece from the Nikki fault of untimely, inexplainably amazing pieces.umm yeah i wrote something similar to this kind of check it out if you have time.

    Amazed & A Bit Scared,
    Jay.
    | Posted on 2006-08-17 00:00:00 | by Flowerinbloom | [ Reply to This ]


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    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.


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