This site will self destruct in 2 months, March 17.
It will come back, and be familiar and at the same time completely different.
All content will be deleted. Backup anything important.
--- Staff
Roleplay Cloud -

Sign up to EliteSkills

Already have an account? Login to Roleplay.Cloud
Forgot password? Recover Password

Born To Conquer

Author: Katana Ryoko
ASL Info:    17/F/Cali
Elite Ratio:    2.86 - 483 /428 /109
Words: 109
Class/Type: Poetry /
Total Views: 1146
Average Vote:    4.0000
Bytes: 750


I was bored and I'm not sure if this works.

Born To Conquer

Born to conquer
Born to riches
Never known rags
He's had the ambition
And lust for power
Ever since he was young

He married a queen
And became her king
It wasn't long
Before he had control
Over the empire
All in his hold

He made plans to seize
The nations around him
One by one they went down
To his military brilliance
He was a man of intelligence
That no one could challenge

His empire grew in wealth and size
But he couldn't keep himself
From the reality of growing old
And he eventually died
Without his rule to guide
The empire fell into decline

Submitted on 2006-08-15 23:08:45     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
Edit post

Rate This Submission

1: >_<
2: I dunno...
3: meh!
4: Pretty cool
5: Wow!


  It's the "lust for power," you added an S. Other than that, I think it's fairly good. It could flow better, but that'll come eventually--it always does.
One thing, though--is this really political? If you look at it a certain way, you could actually see it as an allegory for a bad relationship.
--crimson echo
| Posted on 2006-11-02 00:00:00 | by crimson echo | [ Reply to This ]
  wow such a wise young lady.........great annalogy and metaphor! skips a bit in rythm but over all a great story, well done good lady!.......*turns to young p* ey man its a story enjoy it! dont spycho-annalyze such a thing, its main purpose obviously is something to apply to your own life *hands him a bag of pop-corn* a'ight man now jus lean back in yer lazy boy and watch the magick unfold lol.......all in fun
| Posted on 2006-10-22 00:00:00 | by ropedpoet | [ Reply to This ]
  yep thats life. this poem does work.nice.
| Posted on 2006-08-16 00:00:00 | by darkness | [ Reply to This ]
  i was confused by this one. i understood the concept but i can't think of a person in history that u are talking about. is this about Bush? my brother read this and he said that u pretty much described the life of Alexander the Great.
| Posted on 2006-08-16 00:00:00 | by young p | [ Reply to This ]

Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

1. Be honest.
2. Try not to give only compliments.
3. How did it make you feel?
4. Why did it make you feel that way?
5. Which parts?
6. What distracted from the piece?
7. What was unclear?
8. What does it remind you of?
9. How could it be improved?
10. What would you have done differently?
11. What was your interpretation of it?
12. Does it feel original?