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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: The Unknowndots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: jackz
    ASL Info:    24/F/OH
    Elite Ratio:    3.76 - 591/622/380
    Words: 156
    Class/Type: Poetry/Longing
    Total Views: 570
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 948



    Description:
       I wrote this about 2 weeks after my 15th birthday. sigh.. again this is about my family and what may come out of the near future.. about worries I have and long to not have them...


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsThe Unknowndots
    -------------------------------------------


    When on the road
    I look at the houses that pass us by
    I imagine the families insde
    The people inside are nothing like
    The people in my family
    The families inside those houses
    Are nothing like my family
    The trees are so alive
    In front of these house
    That pass us by
    Yet inside of me I am not
    My soul has been killed
    For emotionly I have out done myself
    I am tired and weak inside
    The pain I've went threw
    And the pain I'm going threw
    Makes me leary
    To what my surroundings are
    Life is not the same
    For tomorrow is unknown
    And its taken all this for me to acknowlege this (the unknown)
    As the same for my future
    Tomorrow may come
    And I may not be here
    The things I worry about
    Is something I wish I didn't have to...
    But I have been given no choice..




    Submitted on 2006-08-17 19:38:48     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      Wow! As I was reading this, in the begining, I wasn't too sure where this was going. Like "Are you comparing your life because you think it's much greater or much worse?" It was sort of a shock when I got to "Yet inside of me I am not, My soul has been killed" I love the contrast in that. This poem is somewhat suspensful, the way you described how you never know what could happen in the near future, and the hopelessness of making things better, so you won't have to worry anymore. Very dark, I love it.
    | Posted on 2006-08-17 00:00:00 | by xmichellex | [ Reply to This ]
      ur a lil diffrent from alot of poetry i have read.. u get a lil deeper but then again u dont reach the extent i think u are but u keep me wondering... but then again i understand what your'e trying to say.. this is hott i like this 1 alot.. nice work .. keep it up
    | Posted on 2006-09-05 00:00:00 | by bryan88 | [ Reply to This ]


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