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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Fakedots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Nani
    ASL Info:    14/Female
    Elite Ratio:    7.23 - 108/46/19
    Words: 149
    Class/Type: Poetry/
    Total Views: 1672
    Average Vote:    4.3333
    Bytes: 912



    Description:
       This is about my friend...what used to be my best friend. I just want people to know that sometimes if you get too caught up in being fake, you lose yourself.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsFakedots
    -------------------------------------------


    You think if you just put on a disguise
    People wonít see who you truly are
    I know I memorize
    Who you were before

    I donít know why youíre doing this
    Why hide your personality?
    Who you were, I truly miss
    Why not show your individuality

    I remember you as my best friend
    How you didnít care what people thought of you
    I remember all the good times we used to spend
    We always shared what we always knew

    Your disguise isnít working
    Everybody knew about it
    They just look at you, smirking
    Why donít you just quit?

    Quit all the hiding
    Quit all the lying
    I have been abiding
    Why have you been denying?

    I canít seem to save you
    You were too caught up being fake
    Now I bid adieu
    I think you made a big mistakeÖ




    Submitted on 2006-08-20 11:43:55     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      Excellent poem, very well written, reminds me of someone in my life, I can definitely relate to this one., Dean
    | Posted on 2007-03-11 00:00:00 | by Survivor_Dean | [ Reply to This ]
      (Insert appreciative whistle here.)
    I know exactly how that feels, but I have NEVER seen anyone write it like that. I'm surprised you don't think you've got much poetry ability (to take your journal to heart); you could do crazy stuff if you put your mind to it.

    Keep up the good work, eh, Lisa?

    --crimson echo
    | Posted on 2007-03-03 00:00:00 | by crimson echo | [ Reply to This ]
      "Fake", very nice. Apparently its a common occurence especially in teens who are often still seeking their own identy as well as some "new" acceptance. Everyone sees it in others, few see it in themselves. Call it a mental block.

    Later, you'll notice it in adults where it sometimes gets really ugly, but mostly its just a coping mechanism. Your message is a good one.
    | Posted on 2007-02-26 00:00:00 | by Blue Monk | [ Reply to This ]
      Nice ending... I think this would work better as a song more than poetry though. Just add a chorus and it would make a nice song.
    | Posted on 2007-02-25 00:00:00 | by Two Meters Away | [ Reply to This ]
      This was very sad. I have a couple friends myself who do the same thing now. I wish they would come back to being how they were before, but I know that, that won't even happen.
    Okay, getting back to the poem, I liked it a lot. Your very good at describing how it feels to have this happen to you. Nice work.

    ~Piper
    | Posted on 2006-09-02 00:00:00 | by PiperH | [ Reply to This ]
      I just LOVE this piece!

    I have added it to my favourite ( if you dont mind ).

    Great work!

    Maddy <3
    | Posted on 2006-08-20 00:00:00 | by welshgirlmaddy | [ Reply to This ]
      wow this is great... I know how it is to be caught up in who you really are...this is great work :)

    ~*Jackie*~
    | Posted on 2006-08-21 00:00:00 | by jackz | [ Reply to This ]
      i think the first two stanzas were the best. i was very impressed by ur rhyming vocabulary. i can barely imagine me trying to rhyme like that when i was thirteen. good job. welcome to elite
    | Posted on 2006-08-21 00:00:00 | by unknown soldier | [ Reply to This ]
      I really like this piece , it makes me think of a certain person in my life that has basically done the same thing, very well written and easy to understand, keep writing, Dean
    | Posted on 2006-08-20 00:00:00 | by Survivor_Dean | [ Reply to This ]
      Oh you are so right I remember when you-know-who use to be normal and when she hung out with us. I'm ashamed to call her my sister now and you know what I was right she is in denial and the way she changes herself to fit in just shoves her even farther away.

    Now about the poem, I only have two words for it: "Luv It!" Wow you are a way better writer then me and lol do not contradict me. *Sigh* this poem is so good and in a sense it's sad too. Kinda makes me wanna cry, remembering all those good old memories. Lol anyways awesome poem and keep it up gurl, I'm always here rooting for you.

    Ash
    | Posted on 2006-08-20 00:00:00 | by Ashuri | [ Reply to This ]
      thats a deep one definitely a lot of meaning in it. I just wish it wasnt so true sometimes ya know.

    just poppin around,
    Eagle (Steven)
    | Posted on 2006-09-08 00:00:00 | by (Eagle) | [ Reply to This ]


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