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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: In the Midst of the Gritdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Aknahlij_d 1
    ASL Info:    17/Male/Loueezy
    Elite Ratio:    3.52 - 369/516/136
    Words: 443
    Class/Type: Lyrics/Angry
    Total Views: 970
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 2617



    Description:
       bang bang


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsIn the Midst of the Gritdots
    -------------------------------------------


    (heavy knowledge)
    Untouchable like my flow was at the bottom of a Hinduís life status
    You niggas claiming youíre stars, well Iím part of the stratus
    More cocky with my flow than a Hustler photo shoot
    A combination of Tupacís "Hail Mary" and Biggieís "Give Me the Loot"
    Destined to be number one, maybe Iíll die in my prime
    Like the writer of Othello I was endowed with the rhyme
    Verses hotter than wearing a leather coat in June
    If yíall shining like the sun Iím eclipsing you niggas like the moon

    (young p)
    Yíall niggas with deals are whack, unnecessarily paid
    When I come out I blow up like an incendiary grenade
    Matter of fact, dynamite
    Because Iím red and when I write it takes a while for me to ignite
    Some say spitting is bad for your health
    So I guess I need help for myself
    I stay flyer than the planes in ďStealthĒ
    I donít wear my chain in the summer time cuz that bitch might mealt

    (unknown soldier)
    I tear niggas to pieces, leaving nothing but residue
    I rock hard while yíall coming with pleasant tunes
    My darkness can repel the moon
    Cold hearted, but I spit hotter than hell in June
    You canít see your defeat but youíre gonna smell it soon
    Itís pretty noxious since youíre projecting these jealous fumes
    Iím the under-taker and Iím prepared to sell your tomb
    You know what they call you whack fellasÖdoomed

    (Munchie)
    When my words are distributed, donít get caught in the vortex.
    Donít take it out of context, for my language is perplexed.
    Iím a Diva to hip hop, flow so deep you can drown.
    Surrounded by my kings, yet I have the prominent crown.
    Similar to the matrix; youíll never break my code.
    Potent as a drug, my delivery will leave you blowed.
    A vixenÖ.. a viragoÖ.. A woman of rage.
    An atomic lyrical weapon that canít be disengaged.

    (Akanhlij'd 1)
    when people talk of faith and fate they tend to let their mouths run
    so i put my boom to it so it goes flat and no one
    talks about the shoguns that hold the swords when
    the chords all get twisted, thats when my niggas get bored
    up through atmospheres, you fear us cuz you seen how long we been here
    its crystal clear that we in like flynn
    dirty harry on my mic stand like a magnum on main street
    aimed at a pussy nigga who thought he could defame me





    Submitted on 2006-08-21 23:13:07     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      I think the proper term is nigger. Secondly, it'd be Cockier, not More cocky. Stealth and mealt is a really bad rhyme. At least the way I say it, don't know about your accent. Nor does residue and tune for that matter, or tomb and doomed. A good rapper need GOOD catchy rhymes man. You need a bigger vocabulary, or to know how to work with the one you already have... I stopped at stanza three.

    Outlaw
    | Posted on 2006-08-22 00:00:00 | by Outlaw | [ Reply to This ]
      I read them seperately first, they are all pretty well written, there were a few spots that I thought could have been revised, and then I sat back and read them all together, there were a still a few spots where the flow got iffy,
    but all in all it works,.

    I think that with the next collabo, the last line of leach verse should rhyme with the first line of the upcoming verse, I think the flow would come together more, hmm i dont know just an idea








    | Posted on 2006-08-24 00:00:00 | by Brack-Attax | [ Reply to This ]


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