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    dots Submission Name: my saviourdots

    Author: GorgeousCorpse
    Elite Ratio:    4.23 - 19/17/9
    Words: 144
    Class/Type: Poetry/Depressed
    Total Views: 837
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 968

       ever hear the phrase "kill 'em with kindness"? this for the one who killed me. i will never be able to write the praise he deserves; i'm nowhere near talented enough.

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsmy saviourdots

    your voice is of the sweetest tone
    you must be heaven-sent
    you never speak in anger, love,
    your kindness doth never relent
    your face is more beauteous by far
    than that of any mere earth creature
    you radiate the warmest glow
    from your every physical feature
    you must be an object of adoration
    to all those whom you know
    if ever a more excellent being existed
    his presence he never did show
    your reverence for all things living
    inspires in me the notion
    that you're an angel from above
    i submit to you my devotion
    your firm embrace protects me
    keeps me safe from earthly perils
    the truth you offer so unbiased
    strenthens my faith in you, the hearald
    i'm humbled in your presence, dear
    i'll never cry again i'm sure
    my angel of death, come to take me home
    for eternity's tenure

    Submitted on 2006-08-28 11:56:08     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      Your poem makes ME feel safe. ^_^ Although I suppose it shouldn't, telling from the last two lines in "angel of death" and "eternity."

    I'm not entirely should who the subject of this poem is because of those last two lines, but the sort of flowery language makes it obvious that it's to someone very important to the narrator. (Also the title. Duh.)

    <I>"than that of any mere earth creature"</I>

    This line doesn't quite fit in with the rest of the poem; it sounds too long and clustered. If you cut out a few syllables to have it match with the previous line, I think it would sound a bit better.

    Anyway, in short, this poem made me sort of happy to read because it pays such affective homage to someone. Thanks for sharing with us!
    | Posted on 2006-08-28 00:00:00 | by Chihuahuii | [ Reply to This ]

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    January 10 07
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