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    dots Submission Name: The Bottomdots

    Author: Valle_Siddious
    ASL Info:    24/Male/Dystopia
    Elite Ratio:    2.51 - 93/94/41
    Words: 122
    Class/Type: Poetry/Depressed
    Total Views: 832
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 987

       Wrote this one in captivity.

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsThe Bottomdots

    Living out of reason, going out of your
    Giving out of season, do you think that
    you are beung fooloed.....
    Making your own dreams, I'm leaving,
    leaving this old broken world.....
    Taking all your love, forgotten,
    always be my only girl........only girl.....
    Running.....I'm running......
    Going nowhere, leaving something,
    showing my hands they have nothing.
    Running......I'm running......
    Shunning life, i'm killing hope,
    with leaving you i cannot cope.
    Lying......The lying......
    Did you feel or were you faking?
    Was it true, my heart is breaking?
    Sighing......The sighing......
    Breathing out this air, i'm dying.
    All the tears i keep on crying.
    Falling back into the pit of darkness....
    The black surrounds me as i hit the bottom.

    Submitted on 2006-08-29 19:30:58     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
      Hey. I definatley liked the new style you put into this. I've never seen anything quite like it, and that's why I'm giving you bonus points for that, and that alone.
    Your wording worked so well too, right along with the style. The breaks in speaking, told exactly the reader the way they were suppose to feel and read it. I love it when a writer is able to do that for its readers. Well done!
    | Posted on 2006-11-10 00:00:00 | by stefhy | [ Reply to This ]
      Wow, I really liked this one! All the words went together and it puts the reader in the same mood this poem was written in. Very very well done!! I'm gonna read some more!

    | Posted on 2006-08-30 00:00:00 | by Ayane | [ Reply to This ]
      Unusual style, but you get your point across well, I can really relate witht he feelings expressed in this piece, Keep writing, Dean
    | Posted on 2006-08-30 00:00:00 | by Survivor_Dean | [ Reply to This ]

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