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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Thought I Knewdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: loveispain
    ASL Info:    23/f/ME
    Elite Ratio:    5.37 - 283/198/51
    Words: 166
    Class/Type: Poetry/Love
    Total Views: 1037
    Average Vote:    1.0000
    Bytes: 1147



    Description:
       He Broke My Heart...and I hate him for it...


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsThought I Knewdots
    -------------------------------------------


    To love again,
    Would be too much.
    To trust again,
    Isn't even possible.
    I didn't know hurt that bad,
    Even existed.
    Thought I knew what love was,
    But you ripped that from heart.
    Thought that love went both ways,
    But you continuously prove me wrong.
    Such a fool,
    For believing your lies.
    So stupid,
    For thinking you felt the same.
    For all those times,
    I saw love in your eyes,
    And heard Forever in your voice,
    I hate you for wearing that mask.
    You hid behind a word.
    Thought saying it,
    Would make it real.
    But everything you said,
    And everything you did,
    Was fake.
    Thought I knew you as a man,
    As a friend,
    As a lover and a partner.
    You killed my soul, and you shattered my heart,
    You selfish, lying, cheating, betraying,
    Sorry excuse for a man.
    To love again,
    Would be too much.
    To trust again,
    Isn't even possible.
    I didn't know hurt this bad,
    Even existed.






    Submitted on 2006-09-06 12:54:56     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

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    2: I dunno...
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    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      I have just recently broken it off my my boyfriend of three years... i found out that he was cheating on me. It helps me release some of my anger when i read this poem. It is really great.
    Thanks

    ~MaGgIe
    | Posted on 2007-06-17 00:00:00 | by Magger32 | [ Reply to This ]
      selfish, lying, CHEATING betraying???!!!!

    wow...ths guy really must have really effed up? did he cheat on you with 8 other women? crazy...this guy must be an [censored]...but from reading your other works...it appears that hes been losing you for long time, and he didn't even know it. hmmm, perhaps thats the stuff you need to express...and come right out n say those things to him... maybe

    Austin
    | Posted on 2006-09-15 00:00:00 | by austin | [ Reply to This ]
      okay

    at first it confused me.. well this part did..."I didn't know hurt that bad,Even existed." i felt it should have said..."I didn't know that it hurt that bad, or even existed."

    But then i read through it all and i finally understood. this is more of a message than a poem and it may not be the best i have read but it certainly is made with emotion for that i give credit.

    You should probley make it flow a bit better but that is just me and im not one of the best writters here so take that as an oppion not advice lol.

    Now for what i really think that i should say to this. this is a good. i love the emotion you displayed and the repeating of the first lines at the end i thought was clever. i know how it is to write on impulse. (thats how i took it if im wrong i applogise) and it seems this may have flown out of you with out really editing it first.

    But all in all i love it. its nice and many can relate to this. if you ever need to rant or rave to someone im just a click away thank you for allowing me to read this.

    all the love
    nikki

    *kisses*
    | Posted on 2006-09-06 00:00:00 | by nikita2u | [ Reply to This ]
      Agh. Oh no. What happened? *Remembers you commenting on a poem of hers about your boyfriend.*

    First off, this piece was emotionally written and that alone made it well-written.

    If you need/want to talk. I'm a PM away.

    BCute<3
    | Posted on 2006-09-06 00:00:00 | by BCute | [ Reply to This ]
      i thnk that it was a nice write maybe it would flow a little better in stanzas. just an idea you dont have to use it. i also in a part or two took out words that i thought di not need to be there. remember these are just suggestions. good work and keep on writing


    To love again,
    Would be too much.
    To trust again,
    Isn't even possible.
    I didn't know hurt that bad,
    Even existed.

    Thought I knew what love was,
    But you ripped that from heart.
    Thought that love went both ways,
    But you continuously prove me wrong.

    Such a fool,
    For believing your lies.
    So stupid,
    For thinking you felt the same.
    For all those times,
    I saw love in your eyes,
    And heard Forever in your voice,

    I hate you for wearing that mask.
    You hid behind a word.
    Thought saying it,
    Would make it real.

    Everything you said,
    Everything you did,
    Was fake.
    Thought I knew you as a man,
    As a friend,
    As a lover and a partner.

    You killed my soul,
    you shattered my heart,
    You selfish, lying, cheating, betraying,
    Sorry excuse for a man.

    To love again,
    Would be too much.
    To trust again,
    Isn't even possible.
    I didn't know hurt this bad,
    Even existed.
    | Posted on 2006-09-12 00:00:00 | by lili | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

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    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
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    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
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    12. Does it feel original?



    117013

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.


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