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    dots Submission Name: Old Frienddots

    Author: pinurplepassion
    ASL Info:    24/f/somewhere in TX
    Elite Ratio:    5.92 - 165/146/17
    Words: 164
    Class/Type: Poetry/Angry
    Total Views: 1505
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1037

       I had a best friend for 15 years, and she turned on me and everyone who ever loved her. I think she got possessed by demons or something, and I am still very angry.

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsOld Frienddots

    Wipe that grin off your face,
    You haven't won yet.
    The truth is locked inside a box,
    Inside my closet,
    And I hold the only key.
    And when that box is opened,
    Oh the light will blind you,
    And you will then remember who you were,
    And hate who you have become.

    So wipe that grin off your face,
    It isn't over.
    All will look at you in horror,
    The mirror will crack,
    And you will scream in pain.
    You will see your own diseased soul,
    And the hideous distortion of your face,
    The same way the world will see you,
    And everyone will run away.

    The grin will be gone from your face,
    And you will suffer.
    For what you have done,
    Cannot be undone with more lies,
    Appologies will fall on deaf ears.
    For every life that you destroyed,
    Yours will be scarred a thousand times.
    And you will walk alone with your misintentions,
    But nobody will win.

    Submitted on 2004-05-21 17:24:57     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      very nicely done easier to understand than some of your others. is this about he who must not be named? cause it certianly sounds like my opinion of him. i really like the way you did this one
    luv ya
    | Posted on 2004-05-26 00:00:00 | by Georgia Gurl | [ Reply to This ]
      that's too bad about your friend. with friends like that, who needs enemies?! there is always that lesson "what goes around comes around," and your poem puts that in bitter forceful words. welcome to the site!
    | Posted on 2004-05-22 00:00:00 | by magnicat | [ Reply to This ]
      I get the feeling of betrayal and anger. I'm thinking that this piece needs more of a backdrop, maybe just a little more of who the two people are, maybe some more imagery. I hope to see a rewrite :)
    | Posted on 2004-05-21 00:00:00 | by nicelyJ | [ Reply to This ]
      it sux when your so called bffs turn their back on you, but sadly sooner or later most of them do. I love the metaphors here and the images, the word choice was well done. I also liked the ending how nobody one. Good job, keep it up.
    | Posted on 2004-05-21 00:00:00 | by Exodus Night Sky | [ Reply to This ]

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