Sign up to EliteSkills

Already have an account? Login to Roleplay.Cloud
Forgot password? Recover Password


Author: rememberplaydoh
Elite Ratio:    4.19 - 78 /103 /60
Words: 125
Class/Type: Poetry /Misc
Total Views: 1073
Average Vote:    No vote yet.
Bytes: 1223



Yet again
checking his page.
Hoping he's there,
waiting for him,
longing to talk.

Still not here?
Tremb'ling outside,
tensing inside,
seeing what is,
fearing what might be.

Is he invisible...
...sending a hint?
...thinking I'll leave?
...avoiding conversation?
...hiding from me?

It can't be so.
Knowing it is,
pretending it isn't,
stilling my heart,
restraining my tears.

There he is!
Trying again...
typing a message
waiting for a response

So, it's true...
breaking down,
falling apart,
hoping against hope,
deceiving myself.

I should leave.
Staying anyway,
steeling my heart,
lying to myself, my love.

Why can't I just let it go...?

Submitted on 2006-09-07 23:23:50     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
Edit post

Rate This Submission

1: >_<
2: I dunno...
3: meh!
4: Pretty cool
5: Wow!


  heh...yeah @ BCute's comment. i know ur pain.

but at Raging's, yeah-it might be modern poetry, but poetry nonetheless. i hope you weren't going to put this piece in the same caste as 'prose' *shakes finger*.

this was more of a realist piece though. unless you;ve been through this internet-romance deal, then you can't really relate to this one.

its sad how we are turning to this internet nowadays for more than just information. we meet some of the most wonderful and delightful individuals who tickle our every fancy, yet never end up meeting them at times, or even getting a phone call.

the internet is a shield. it shields us from the embarassment of a relationship gone wrong in person. and we can just log off, leave, or discontinue discourse at our will, we are in control whereas when in person, we don't have control over our emotions, or pain dealt unto us by our 'partner'...

a fav for its originality...

Loquacious Mind
| Posted on 2006-09-09 00:00:00 | by Loquacious Mind | [ Reply to This ]
  Seriously, though this is a short, almost non-poetic piece, it has its tang that adds it to poetry. Modern poetry, if I may say.

This is so true. My ex boyfriend and I started going downhill this way, and I've seen so many relationships end on the internet. It breaks hearts worse than in person, because you can't talk to them face to face.

I click refresh every day and my current boyfriend is always there, waiting eagerly to talk to me. I really hope that you have a better evening and are able to let the situation go. Good luck!!

| Posted on 2006-09-07 00:00:00 | by Raging Rain | [ Reply to This ]
  Ugh. Omg. *Relates to this so much right now*

*Is probably going to go cry*

This was real. I have been doing this all damn day. Sucks. Sucks So freaking bad.

Thank you for posting something real.

*Goes to click Refresh again hereslf*

| Posted on 2006-09-07 00:00:00 | by BCute | [ Reply to This ]

Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

1. Be honest.
2. Try not to give only compliments.
3. How did it make you feel?
4. Why did it make you feel that way?
5. Which parts?
6. What distracted from the piece?
7. What was unclear?
8. What does it remind you of?
9. How could it be improved?
10. What would you have done differently?
11. What was your interpretation of it?
12. Does it feel original?