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Author: rememberplaydoh
Elite Ratio:    4.19 - 78 /103 /60
Words: 90
Class/Type: Poetry /Misc
Total Views: 1236
Average Vote:    No vote yet.
Bytes: 720


Short poem, sort of in response to a comment I got about expanding my vocabulary.


If I were brilliant...
...maybe I'd write
in much higher English
and "wow" all my readers.

If I were brilliant...
...perhaps I'd get feedback
that was more like "critique"
and less like plain comments.

If I were brilliant...
Aww, I give up!
I'm fooling myself;
it's not going to happen.


If I were brilliant...
it would be the product
of writing a lot;
I'd need some more practice.

If I were brilliant.... could happen,
I just can't give up,
I guess....I'll keep writing.

Submitted on 2006-09-11 00:05:47     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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  at least in the end you keep writing. i know this comment is short and it sucks,

mike :)

ok ok fine i kinda vibe with the spirit of the poem allthough it doesnt sound Dohfull at all, this must be a depressed version of the Doh i talk to. hmmm if i were going with the spirit of this poem i would say if i were a brilliant commentor perhaps i would have a place here, ha! there put a little more effort into it.

:) mikeyz :)
| Posted on 2006-09-14 00:00:00 | by inspirit999 | [ Reply to This ]
  I like the self-deprecating humour in this-- it's good to be able to laugh at oneself... because it's, well... healthy for you lol.

There's a trade-off between good diction and conveying emotion. A wonderful vocab won't get you anywhere if you fail to connect with readers; if you use high-sounding poncy words with no real grounded emotions, you'll just look like a pretentious jerk-off. Lol, which I may well be... but ultimately, I hope there's realness to what I write. Like you should too.

To expand your diction, read read read. I bet you've heard it lots. But it's true. It's more often the lyrical sound of a word and how they all go together which makes me excited to write, and also the base idea/emotion grounding it.

Not meaning to 'lecture' you... but hey, I'm just saying you shouldn't give up and think you'll never get better. That's self-defeatist and pointless. We all get better, if we truly want it, if writing or art in general is the only thing which makes you feel truly alive.


| Posted on 2006-09-11 00:00:00 | by alteredlife | [ Reply to This ]

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