without meaning -------------------------------------------
i live in the land of sin
where money earns power {thats their way}
and they milk you fa free
cause the honey's turned sour {these are the days}
Bleeding my poetry outa swollen lips
wishing my soul was free in the moment that i've spoken this
depleated of energy
defeated, the meaning is lost, as i breathe in the melody
Serenity prayer's on the tip of my tounge
in my enemies lair my life held in the grip of his gun
and the rhythm that you feelin is the beat of my heart
in my throat, cause you know that i can't see in the dark
the severity increases
as prosperity decreases
but the pain fluctuation is ceaseless
adrenaline releases into my bloodstream flowing
as my skeleton siezes
starin into the faces of the devil and his deamons
knowing with the upmost certainty
they gon' murder me
thinkin that while they talkin in a drunken slur
in my minds eye i see the sky line of London burn
reminisions of Nero's Rome
repititions of a lost hero's poem
written on the airwaves
blarin on your sterio....
i liked this one but it didn't have the impact on me that most of ur other writes have. i don't know why. anyway keep writing. u should post more so i'll have more good stuff to read
the only thing i can agree with Gadfly on is that you need to fix the spelling errors. the ones you made however, are typical. tip: proofread. as far as grammatical errors go, that's urban. that's prolly just how you talk. you should write the way you speak. unless it's formal writing, which in that case, is named for what it is, formal. but i love this. this flows so well and the message is true. i opened this thinking, with a name like orpheus, this poem had better be great. and it is. you live up to your alias.
Aside from spelling errors and grammatical fixes, I really liked the message of this song. It does not seem to have a chorus, though, which would help the reader come back to your main idea in the piece.
Submission Name: without meaning
