Description: mmm The death or the dying of a loved one.. yet a hated one..
Love.. HATE -------------------------------------------
Lye in your bed so still...
As the muisc plays
And the fan keeps going in its consistant rotation
And your thoughts of death
Of a soul leaving a persons body
Lingers within your mind...
For these are not sucidal thoughts
Simply thoughts of a loved one
Of a hated one
Whom might be fately ill
For this relation you have with this deathly ill person
Is sweet yet sour..
Loving ... warm hearted..
Yet cold as ice..
His body so lifeless..
You can only feel guilt...
Yet remorse for this guilt.
As you long to simply pull it back
go back and search for this guilt this sadness
You bring upon yourself..
Because he's brought plent of sorrows on you..
Plenty of hardships on you
you never desvered or longed to have...
Yet his lifeless body brings tears to your eyes..
For this is not the first time .. he's brought tears to your eyes..
I amilessly lye helpless in this bed of mine
With thoughts of him
And just how lifeless his body really is..
And this guilt..
Within my thoughts
This is a really good piece, it really shows how much you care for that person, how much you regret ending things with that person,how you regret making them feel like nothing, how you hate them but love them, how your feelings for them have turned cold and nothing can fix it, you could try stanzas, and three are a few spelling mistakes but just minor stuff.