Description: A poem composed during history class..just like my other one written before this..i dont think it has a title yet.
**Unlived Life -------------------------------------------
He went off to war
Thinking it brave
Not prepared for the unmarked path
That lay ahead
A path that would lead
Back home or to Death
Life sped up
And lived in misery
Til the day God discovered
He had an extra pair of wings.
Ooh, I liked this one. It captures just how sad and AVOIDABLE war is. It is unfortunate that thousands of soliders have died in seperate wars, and many of them did not even get proper funeral services and were often laid on the battlefeild to rest. Personally, I think it is their fault. If no one joined the army, then war could easily be avoided. I guess it would be difficult to disarm the world, but any how, what you wrote was good.
I'm not too sure about "A path that would lead to/ Life or Death." I guess I feel like life is implied if he doesn't die, and I also think you repeat path and life in too close proximity. I think you could revise this to avoid that. "Life or Death" are just so often together that it's overused. I think something like "home or death" might work better. I love the last two lines "Til the day God discovered/ He had a pair of extra wings." That's very evocative.