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    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: the mandots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: lynn7
    Elite Ratio:    3.2 - 297/212/58
    Words: 122
    Class/Type: Poetry/Misc
    Total Views: 113
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 763



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsthe mandots
    -------------------------------------------



    the world is going sideways
    the man is standing still
    the breeze of tomorrow
    is floating through his will

    so much talent
    so much to waste
    so many dreams
    floating unto space
    he gives up on life
    he can't find a way
    for the passion to free today
    so he just sits and watches
    the world go astray

    even if he wanted
    what good would he make
    there's so much opposition
    to much of it is fake
    so much is a show
    for all to see
    to deceive the weak
    to condemn the free

    he dreams sometimes of a song
    a sweet melody
    to ease the mind and set
    his spirit free




    Submitted on 2006-09-28 00:20:49     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      What a great poem this is. Your description is just about perfect for the way you told this story.

    And I am sure you will strike a chord with many men who read this.

    Frank.
    | Posted on 2006-11-26 00:00:00 | by Frank Maguire | [ Reply to This ]
      Omg! It's made me depressed when I was reading it. It gave off so much emotion. But the ending made me happy again.

    Freebird
    | Posted on 2006-09-28 00:00:00 | by FreeBird | [ Reply to This ]
      I imagined a man just sitting on a gray day pondering on life as the world passes by. i liked how at the end there was some hope to be found. There was one line though that I think needs to be fixed "to decieve to weak" .. is there a comma there? Or is to supposto be the?
    Good work!
    | Posted on 2006-09-28 00:00:00 | by isis_lenore | [ Reply to This ]



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