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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Fa-Qdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: spacedoutboy
    ASL Info:    22/M/Il
    Elite Ratio:    3.09 - 32/48/23
    Words: 175
    Class/Type: Poetry/
    Total Views: 846
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1167



    Description:
       This one's pretty much self-explanitory. If it hits a lil too close to home for some of you, my deepest apologies. If you are offended just because it's graphic, and think it should be taken down because of it...Your a pansy, get over it... I've known to many people to fall victim to horrific crimes of this kind. And it makes me sick to my stomach. Hardly anyone would have the balls to make a poem like this, but I like to push boundaries and break the mold. But this is far from a pleasent poem, so if your easily offended...DONT READ IT!!!


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsFa-Qdots
    -------------------------------------------


    As they die there
    With their thoughts broken open
    The stolen sanctity
    Ripped away with all your pushing
    Sucked the life right out of them
    Within them periling
    Discarded their halos
    And stepped on their angel wings

    Concentrated blows
    Ripping the lines of skin
    Suggestive feel strokes
    The only way that you can feel
    Sadistic torment
    Fun for you in every way

    Broken Dolls and Shattered Minds
    Tortured Souls and Deadened Eyes
    You stole their shine
    You left them cold
    Dead to life and all alone

    Broken bags the shuttering daze
    Rip off your tool and throw away
    Haunted dreams that forever last
    The sickening thought of your pathetic grasp

    They'll wait for you on the other plane
    To hand you back all your pain
    They'll lay you out and bind you up
    Cut out your soul and chop it up
    Drive their hate into your eyes
    Dig them out and cauterize
    Slit your throat and watch it sag
    And this still wont kill the pain they have...




    Submitted on 2006-09-28 04:31:51     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
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    4: Pretty cool
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    ||| Comments |||
      this poem isnt offensive at all. u needed to e discriptive to show the light. u rote for a good cause.

    shyt like that get s me really mad. ughh anger now

    awsome write.
    | Posted on 2006-10-03 00:00:00 | by darkness | [ Reply to This ]
      i completely misconstrued the meaning of this. and after knowing its true defination i can't quite bring myself to read it again.it's way too personal for me on both levels. i love it anyway.
    | Posted on 2006-09-30 00:00:00 | by black widow | [ Reply to This ]
      Whoah!! Yep, that about covers it.
    loved the description you gave to introduce the poem. nicely done.
    this is kinda like shoving it in our faces, rubbing our noses in it. it yells 'wake up'!!

    love the verse ~

    'Broken Dolls and Shattered Lives
    Tortured Souls and Deadened Eyes
    You stole their shine
    You left them cold
    Dead to life and all alone'

    very clever.
    this piece shows a lot of pure feeling and emotion, you poured yourself into this one and done a good job. i think you still could have been even more graphic, without going over the top though.
    and yes, i am a pansy.
    whirl**
    | Posted on 2006-09-28 00:00:00 | by whirl | [ Reply to This ]


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