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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: fear no moredots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: BrOkEn4gOoD
    ASL Info:    17/f/queens
    Elite Ratio:    2.82 - 20/12/14
    Words: 84
    Class/Type: Deep Thought/Dark
    Total Views: 92
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 408



    Description:
       


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    dotsfear no moredots
    -------------------------------------------


    I have feared things for most of my life therefor i am scared but the razor is all Ive known and pain that shed the tears crying every night to take it away nothing ever matters now nothings the same I'm in a dark hole I'm in a dark place I'm in a dark room no one can see my face the world shatters away from me slowly taking everything now there is no suffer there is no pain there is no me




    Submitted on 2006-10-01 21:36:18     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    1: >_<
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    ||| Comments |||
      your words are good. the descriptions of your emotions are great. i just find it hard to follow set out like this. if you used stops and commas, and split it into stanzas or paragraphs, it would flow much easier for the reader.
    the dark hole is a place we have all been. i love how you portray a kind of helplessness, a void you can't shake yourself out of.
    nice piece,
    whirl**
    | Posted on 2006-10-02 00:00:00 | by whirl | [ Reply to This ]



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    January 10 07
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