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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: cant controldots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: ladiesplanet1
    ASL Info:    23.cali baby
    Elite Ratio:    3.58 - 720/463/165
    Words: 89
    Class/Type: Poetry/
    Total Views: 587
    Average Vote:    4.0000
    Bytes: 487



    Description:
       oh well. i know it looks like i doubt it but i dont. i try not to. i'm just so afraid of being hurt again. i dont know what to do. my life is so difficult and right now he is the only thing that i feel is actually okay right now in my life. what happens if i lose that only good thing i have? what will i have except nothing??? where would i be? who would i be? i've lost myself to him and i just want to make him happy. i'm happy... at least i am when im around him... most of the time... kind of... i dont know. sometimes he says things that make me want to cry. sometimes he says things that hurt me and i dont know what to do. how do i fix this??? does this need fixing??? is this really happening??? how long until its gone? what will i do once this is gone??? i dont kow. i'm so confused.


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    dotscant controldots
    -------------------------------------------


    how do i know that he wont hurt me
    when everyone tells me he will
    what can i do if this fear comes true
    how will i ever be still

    how can i change this thing we call fate
    if it is already chose
    what can i do when everythings gone
    when all i have is then exposed

    these feelings of fear and wanting to last
    is something i cant control
    what will i do when all this is done
    and i am left with a hole




    Submitted on 2006-10-06 17:47:32     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      i liked it...i dont really get to see things from "her" side ever so to speak
    | Posted on 2006-11-03 00:00:00 | by CFHillyard | [ Reply to This ]
      This poem is good, I know so many people try to interfere when a new relationship starts, and then you’re left wondering what to do. At the end I suppose the decision of what you do is up to you though, you’re the one who has to make the choice.

    "when all I have is then exposed" This line seems not to go with the poem, there seems a word too much, and it confuses the rhyme scheme a little. Try changing it to just "when all I have is exposed"

    Linzi xx
    | Posted on 2006-10-13 00:00:00 | by Linzi | [ Reply to This ]
      Wow i really liked this poem .. i can so relate to it i felt the same way with an exof mine.. most of my friends said he was playing me and such but i refused to believe them and in the end he was and i left his ass but anyway u captured the feelings wonderfully keep up the wonderious work.

    ~ timely
    | Posted on 2006-10-07 00:00:00 | by Oscura | [ Reply to This ]
      Hey, I have a friend like you. She was in an abusive relationship when she was younger, a couple of years ago, and now it's hard for her to trust anyone enough to date them.

    I just wanted to share that so you know you're not the only one out there that gets nervous...

    Personally, if I were you, I'd trust my gut and what I personally think about this guy, and screw what everyone says. Yes their probably just looking out for your best intrests, but still, they can't know you 100%, only you can, so just relax a little and hope for the best.

    Sorry this wasn't really about your poem...

    If you need to talk, PM me:)

    Lia
    | Posted on 2006-10-06 00:00:00 | by Glassy Eyed | [ Reply to This ]
      Hey,
    You always have to remember there is someone worse off than you, I know that, from this poem, you seem to be having a rough time but I know from experience that no matter how many times your trust is broken you can always find someone new to trust - faith in life that things will get better.
    All the best,
    Steph.
    | Posted on 2006-10-06 00:00:00 | by steffunni | [ Reply to This ]


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