Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Attempting Redemption.dots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Save the Queen
    Elite Ratio:    4.72 - 66/72/20
    Words: 413
    Class/Type: Rant/Venting
    Total Views: 861
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 2387



    Description:
       I'm not sure if this is a rant or just random thoughts. I'm not sure if this is venting, or about friendship, or about love, or about all of the above. I'd like you to say whatever you feel. If you think I'm mental or if you've written something like this before... or never got the chance to.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsAttempting Redemption.dots
    -------------------------------------------


    It's funny how old I feel all of a sudden.

    It seems like just yesterday I looked in the mirror and cared about the reflection.

    It seems like just yesterday I would cry about everything said behind my back.

    It seems like just yesterday I realized that I liked him...

    It seems like just yesterday I met you.

    Isn't it funny how that was all such a long time ago?

    You don't know me anymore. It's your fault, and maybe mine too. But I'm not the sort to hold out for those who don't show any signs of caring.

    You say that it's too hard to speak your mind infront of me and the rest of the world. And yet I have no problem with it. Maybe we just don't see eye to eye in these things... after all, I'm still taller than you.

    I understand that my physical stature tends to invoke terror on those who cant look me in the eye. I'd scare me too. Good thing those who take my place are shorter and have to look up to you. But with that measurement it takes two of them to make up for one of me.

    Maybe I do blow things out of proportion sometimes. Maybe this has all been a lost cause. But it's not like you ever made it worth my while. I'm not as easily entertained as I used to be.

    Can you even understand the words that carry my thoughts into the world for everyone to hear? Do you even care? But please don't answer that with more words. I've had enough of them.

    So hard it is to forget about the ones you love the most. Maybe that's why people cry when they're hearbroken. Maybe it's worse when you know you'll still have to look that person in the eyes on a regular basis. Maybe there's hope in those tears.

    And maybe that hope is worthless.

    Worthless, worthless, worthless. That word gets me everytime. How can something that isn't even tangible be worthless? How does anyone find it in themselves to keep something like that with them, even when their last tear is shed?

    Oh, what a bundle of ramblings these words are. Do you even understand? Probably not. Even though it's all here, spelled out for you. Just for you. All for you.

    Do you even know I'm here?




    Submitted on 2006-10-15 05:43:49     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      hey look its that thing you put on myspace. same comment really. besides the title. its just so....... i cant think of a word but you know. its allright if i use it somehow right? and well... dont let those large mongooses get you down!


    -chan
    | Posted on 2006-10-16 00:00:00 | by Saphire Twiligh | [ Reply to This ]
      I'm not even gonna bother with a critique...

    Other than a few grammatical errors.. Wow.

    You actually managed to form a rant into something with a meaning. From a completely different angle than I've ever seen anyone try. Paragraph 10 was what really got me... It's funny how a poem that appears to be about romance (or lack thereof) can be interpreted so many different ways.

    This really made me sad, in a good way that so few can accomplish now.
    | Posted on 2006-10-15 00:00:00 | by Darkess | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    121621

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.


    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry