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    dots Submission Name: Six Feet Underdots

    Author: Max R.
    Elite Ratio:    3.14 - 33/29/17
    Words: 97
    Class/Type: Poetry/Death
    Total Views: 508
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 587


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    dotsSix Feet Underdots

    I trusted you
    You let me down

    I asked you to stop
    You said, Ďone moreí
    You said you were okay
    I asked to go home
    You jumped in the car
    And told me to come
    We sped into the night
    I asked you to slow
    To turned to me and smiled
    You didnít see the lights
    Until it was too late

    Now Iím in the ground
    Six feet under
    As you stand above
    And cry in wonder
    They lead you away
    In cuffs and chains

    I trusted you
    You let me down

    Submitted on 2006-10-16 10:37:27     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      This is a good poem about a very serious problem that affects us all. So often people make bad decisions, especially when alcohol is involved. It is tragic that the ones that usually pay for this are the innocent ones who just so happen to be in the wrong place at the right time. I never allowed myself to be in this kind of situation. If I knew my friend had too much to drink, I wouldnt let them drive. And if they were so ignorant not to listen, which did happen on occasion, I never got in the car with them. I would call someone to come pick me up. We are all responsible for ourselves and awareness is so important in protecting ourselves. Anyway, this is a good write. We should always be so careful with who we trust.

    | Posted on 2006-10-17 00:00:00 | by lmz | [ Reply to This ]
      This is a good poem with a really good point to it. The flow of the words is a little rough to read because of some errors in the wording. But other than that it is looked at by an excellent point of view. I like the grief and disappointment you show in it.
    | Posted on 2006-10-16 00:00:00 | by Katana Ryoko | [ Reply to This ]

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