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Sitting in this darkened room


Author: Jingles
ASL Info:    19.m.canada
Elite Ratio:    2.08 - 18 /60 /36
Words: 136
Class/Type: Deep Thought /Romance
Total Views: 1087
Average Vote:    No vote yet.
Bytes: 1021



Description:


This isn't one of my best writes. But it's the way I felt about something.It pretty self explaitory what its about.Just give me youre opinions and tell me if i need to change something or make it better somehow.


Sitting in this darkened room



Sitting in this darkened room
Crimson pain and cascading fear.
Every whisper never meant
Shattered moments dissapear.

Sitting in this darkened room
Silenced thoughts come into view.
Arguements and screams of hate
As regret binds me to you.

Sitting in this darkened room
Flowers and tears across the page.
Hatred blinds every sense
While your voice guides me the way.

Sitting in this darkened room
Immortality resting in your gaze.
Enveloped in beauty, whithin a smile
This darkness now fades away.

Sitting in this brightened room
My angel dressed in white.
No more pain and no more fear
On our wedding night.

Layin in this darkened tomb
My lifleless hand still holding yours.
Life anew,eternity ours
Lets live it togethor
Forever and always.
In this darkened tomb




Submitted on 2006-10-17 04:19:14     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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Comments


  This is beautifully crafted. I like the repetition of "In this darkened room." In the end though (I may be too old?) I don't get it. The deoument, if you like, didn't seem to marry with the preceding verses. This may well be my loss.

Donald
| Posted on 2006-10-17 00:00:00 | by siradrian | [ Reply to This ]


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