Spot Light SHow For No One

Author: S.A.M. ASL Info:    26/f/xx Elite Ratio:    3.78 - 476 /419 /138 Words: 102

Class/Type: Poetry /Serious Total Views: 1497 Average Vote:    No vote yet. Bytes: 649

Description:

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Spot Light SHow For No One

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He walks that double yellow line a rambler in the wind, his music is his life his guitar his only friend. Fame was a masked murderer, the spot light blinded his view. never saw what he’d become, never knew he’d lost it all. fans would scream his name, but no one really knew, could they not see, They stole from him all he truly cared for. Lost were the days where music was all fun, lost were his friends, his love, now that’s all he knows. A rambler in the wind, he walks that double yellow line.

Submitted on 2006-10-18 11:25:23     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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Comments

I particulary didn't like this one. I think you were trying to fit a story idea into a short poem, and to me it sounds like you just through it together. Don't get me wrong, you are good, and this is not a bad idea, but merely that's all it is to me, is a rough copy of an idea. Something like music is beautiful, and you wouldnt have to MAKE your poem outstanding to make it good, because anything about music is great. So theres a good thing to think about when you are revising this, or possibly making it into either a much longer poem, something with meaning, or a short story. Great job though, I'm not putting you down or anything, neither this piece, but after reading 'graveyard sunrise' (I think it was called) I know you are capable of coming up with something much better than this, and then maybe, you'll see you can do even better than 'graveyard sunrise.' Keep working on it, I know your a good writer, and that's why I'm not too fond of this one. necrotic

| Posted on 2007-05-31 00:00:00 | by necrotic | [ Reply to This ]

badass...love this one...prolly cause I can relate ;)

| Posted on 2007-04-16 00:00:00 | by OrionsStorm | [ Reply to This ]

man I can relate to that sometimes poeple don't realize why I am so "obsesed" with my guitar and my music , and they think that I am weird but I tell them that , you know , its just my life and its who I am its that simple :) but I love this peice and I believe that I will add this to one of my favorites. much LOVE JAmes

| Posted on 2006-10-18 00:00:00 | by James Reyna | [ Reply to This ]

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