Description: every one will want to change you. no matter how great you are....inside
About you -------------------------------------------
Plastic makes up a Barbie
A barbie is notthing but a toy
Just another teenage dirtbag for another boy,
Dress me up, Dress me down
You flipped my world
So a smile is really a fown
You say you changed me for the better
Yeah. Ok. Whatever
You say you know me like back of your hand
But I dont think thats true
Do you know I write Poems?
Just like all the other ones this one is about you.
Good stuff. brought back many memories from when i was young. Especially like the lines You flipped my world So a smile is really a frown (you missed the r out by the way) However i agree with the above comment- leaving out the last stanze, i definatly think the first stanza is very powerful.
very nice concept. i think if i were to improve it, i'd start with deciding rather or not it should be rhyme or prose. if you decide to rhyme then make sure you've got the rhythm down. however, i think this would be much more pleasurable if it were prose. right now it seems to be somewhere inbetween and that kind of through me off a bit.
also, i would consider leaving out the last stanza. the first stanza could really be more effective alone.