Description: the inspiration was paramore "oh star"
Wishing Star -------------------------------------------
If I had one wish,
I would pick you Star to make a wish upon.
Please don't go away.
No one can wait this long.
Will you let me make a wish upon you?
Do you let them come true?
Please don't go away.
Let me think of what you'll accept of me.
I won't forget.
Let me make a wish upon you.
I wish for us to sing beyond our voices believe.
I wish for love to shower our souls in retreat.
I wish for you to not go away.
Oh wishing star, I wish upon you.
I really enjoyed this one lot a great flow to this and simply beautful this style of writing suits you very well I agree this one is different than your othe writes totally enjoyed this a great deal love your work as always.
i like this poem, like everyone else has already said...its not your normal style of writing. i think thats why i really liked it, it was different than most of the other stuff i have read of yours. this piece is very clear and straight forward, and you even kept it simple. keep up the good flow and i will keep reading.
This was diffarent comming from you. Not your style sort of speak. But its good. I liked it, anyway. It was nice to read a new post, its been a while. Keep it up. ~David~
I like this it has its ups and downs tho just like any poem.first ups:I can tell what this poem was ment to stand for and i can feel emotions clear as day.
but there is a spelling error:I would pick you star to make a wish upon.:i think its should be your star? and here r some sugestions to help improve upon ur poem:put it in stanzas<always helps with organization and to fit whats supposed to be said together> :rymeing<rymeing usaully gives more beet,and i have to say im a sucker for good rymeing lol>
but those r only suggestions it is very good and i like it.
Your intentions in this poem are very clear and straightforward. Something I dont like to make quite as familiar in my poetry most of the time. One thing Id suggest is reading through a poem before posting it over to make sure there arent any mistakes because there are a few lines in here that just dont seem to work to be honest. However, you displayed how you felt and allowed this to work as a nice emotional release nonetheless.
Submission Name: Wishing Star
