Bloodied Blade of Betrayal

Author: precious_poetry ASL Info:    19 F TN Elite Ratio:    3.17 - 137 /145 /67 Words: 71

Class/Type: Poetry /Betrayal Total Views: 1029 Average Vote:    No vote yet. Bytes: 476

Description:

---

Bloodied Blade of Betrayal

---

This blade in my back, Covered in my blood, Held by your hand, The one I loved. Your act so cruel, I bleed to death, You simply watch, As I draw last breath. You shed not a tear, Over my lifeless corpse, Just go, walk away, How easily you warp... Your true being shows, By the blood on this blade, Lodged in my back, How I've been betrayed...

Submitted on 2006-10-29 15:23:43     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
Edit post

Rate This Submission

1: >_< 2: I dunno... 3: meh! 4: Pretty cool 5: Wow!

Comments

full of emotion and pain especially the pain of betrayal and deception. it could be longer though because somehow it feels unfinished. peace, becka

| Posted on 2006-10-29 00:00:00 | by boo boo | [ Reply to This ]

Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

1. Be honest. 2. Try not to give only compliments. 3. How did it make you feel? 4. Why did it make you feel that way? 5. Which parts? 6. What distracted from the piece?

7. What was unclear? 8. What does it remind you of? 9. How could it be improved? 10. What would you have done differently? 11. What was your interpretation of it? 12. Does it feel original?

123127