Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • ES Magazine
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • Video Tutorials
  • RolePlay
  • 90% off Amazon
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Piles Of Sanddots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Glassy Eyed
    ASL Info:    17/f
    Elite Ratio:    3.8 - 550/427/187
    Words: 164
    Class/Type: Poetry/Nostalgia
    Total Views: 212
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 940



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsPiles Of Sanddots
    -------------------------------------------


    Standing here in this barren wasteland of dunes and tumble weeds,
    I find myself more alone then I have been in a while.
    There is nothing out here, savor a few sun cracked rocks and red sand hills;
    Not what I am looking for to replace the cool waters I remember from when I was with you.

    My throat is too dry to call out for help.
    Not that there is anyone near enough around to hear my pleads.
    The sun is beating down on my unprotected body,
    You have left me here, in this vast emptiness, completely defenseless against the unknown.

    But it no longer matters, I come to realize as I look down at my hands;
    They are slowly dispersing; dispersing into grains of sand,
    Drifting downwards, most likely to join the rest of the girls’ whose hearts you have trampled;
    To become like the rest of them, just another pile of sand that you never need pick up.




    Submitted on 2006-10-29 20:55:35     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      A classic lover's lament with wonderful images of the desert juxaposed to cool waters...very ably and very deftly done poetry...bravo...bravo...I liked it muchly...Michael
    | Posted on 2006-11-24 00:00:00 | by Algol46 | [ Reply to This ]
      I really liked this one. A great new piece that makes me imagine fabulous landscapes and a somewhat angst ridden central character. Loved the metaphores - subtle yet recognisable. The form is such that rhyme would actually spoil it. Keep them coming.
    | Posted on 2006-10-30 00:00:00 | by Porcelaine | [ Reply to This ]
      oh my god. we have written a poem with the same subject matter. i just wrote a poem that has this theme. i can truly see exactly what you feel through this one. check out my poem "I Always Get The Leftovers". i swear its uncanny.
    | Posted on 2006-10-30 00:00:00 | by DBC | [ Reply to This ]
      I enjoyed your imagry of sand to how this person made the poet feel. im gathering that this person was really hurt, because a guy, just used her, and did what ever he wanted, probly made her feel like the world and then crushed her heart, and never cared to make her feel better, almost like a cheap thrill. its sad that there are men out there that do that. She seemed to really like the guy, almos felt like in love, but yet hurt and angry because she gave in to him. If im write or wrong please let me know. i would appriciate it.

    -Death-
    | Posted on 2006-10-30 00:00:00 | by DeathTone | [ Reply to This ]



    Full Anime Episodes Streaming Free
    5 million youtube videos all rated over 4.7 stars with 40+ ratings

    [ Copy this | Start New | Full Size ]

    Google
     

    [ Chrispian ] [ Write Forum ]
    [ Friends ] [ SNESroms ] .
    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry
    This user has been inactive for more than 5 days.