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Stupid Love Games

Author: x__beenplayed
Elite Ratio:    8 - 8 /4 /5
Words: 233
Class/Type: Lyrics /BrokenHeart
Total Views: 842
Average Vote:    No vote yet.
Bytes: 1478


Dedicated to Alysa

Stupid Love Games

Verse 1:
you're silent, and it's just not like you
I would try to bring some comfort
but I know there is none for this type of hurt
not when you were forced to play the game
to which you did not know the rules
not that they mattered
cause your heart still got shattered

you took your chance
when you rolled the dice
but it wasn't right because
the tables were tilted against you
making sure you could not win
and you lost everything
including your heart
to these stupid love games

Verse 2:
I don't know what you are thinking
and I don't know if I should ask
or just let you iet and lick all of your wounds
so you can find your own way to heal
when you should have never been hurt
but they didn't care
how much it was for you to bare

Verse 3:
I didn't want you to go through all the
shit that I had to but really
it's your decisions and I can only help
to point you in the right direction
cause you have to walk through the door
I will pray for you
and you better make it through

you took your chance
when you rolled the dice
and you lost everything
to these stupid
these stupid
these stupid love games

Submitted on 2006-10-29 23:08:54     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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  Pretty good lyrics, actually. Obviously, this not being a poem I have no authority to comment on rhyme or rhythm, but I doubt those are big issues with regards to this piece. The narrator could be anyone talking to anyone else, but somehow I imagined a (single) mother who has been hurt time and time again addressing her teenaged daughter. It fits.

Writing in the second person is affective here and although the language is simplistic, it's logically so. These are great lyrics, that's what I think. Now thoughts aside, I've got a couple of nitpicks. Verse one, line five; "rules". Verse two, line three; "sit and lick". Verse three, line two; put a comma after "to", line three; "decision" without the 's'.

Keep writing,

| Posted on 2006-10-30 00:00:00 | by DeepDreamer2008 | [ Reply to This ]

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