Cliff hanger by fiery whisper

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Submission Name: Cliff hanger dots

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Author:	fiery whisper
ASL Info:	21/F/Bangladesh
Elite Ratio:	5.13 - 51/49/33
Words:	62

Class/Type:	Poetry/Serious
Total Views:	162
Average Vote:	No vote yet.
Bytes:	359

Description:

Cliff hanger dots

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Read my story, read if you care
As the words play out their wisdom,
Read all that I share,
And if the pages run too long,
The nightmares more than you can bare,
Leave, leave at your risk
Leave if you dare.
When the tides high, and the tides die
I'll be safe, I'll be whole, alone in my lair.

Submitted on 2006-11-01 11:26:47 Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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1: >_<
2: I dunno...
3: meh!
4: Pretty cool
5: Wow!

||| Comments |||
  Oh wow! That is so awesome. I mean it is indeed a very mature piece of writing. You mesmerize me once again but more importantly this was quite a thinker.

You are so full of surprizes. I mean honestly that does not read or sound like a piece coming from anyone your age. What I mean to say is that, it sounds as if it has been written by someone who has seen life to all its intricacies. Someone probably in her middle age trying to explain how she has seen it all and knows that she will fight through and survive. Yet it reflect your zeal towards life. How you are always ready fight and know your foothold. It is the typical warrior in you. I could expect such a powerful write only from you and you have not dissapointed.

I like how you provoke the reader with line such as "leave if you dare". At the same time how you are all welcoming with the first line "read if you care". Then the transition to becoming more and mroe rigid. Then of course there is the super awesome concluding line.

In the context of the poem the last line seems to be very self assured. Basically the entire piece potrays a very confident personality. Yet, to me there is this little irony in it all. Since within that confidence I see fear and paranoia. Do not ask why, then again ou probably know why I said that. Still there is this hint of paranoia and fear. "Everythings goes away in the end and I am the only one left behind all alone." Of course that is not true and you will not be left alone but there is something that I perceive. Anyways, loved this write.

peace love and empathy,

yours
| Posted on 2006-11-13 00:00:00 | by forestspirit | [ Reply to This ]
  This is a really good write where you describe the emoion that is carrying your Heart very well
In this write I see a young woman who has learned much through life and is eager to share that Love but always finds others who are not as eager to learn the knowledge she has learned through life
Very well worded
You were able to create quite a visual in my mind with the short amount of words used
Excellent Write!!!
God Bless
Ron

Please if you get a chance I have just posted 2 new writes Please take a look at them and let me know what you think
Thank You
Ron
| Posted on 2006-11-01 00:00:00 | by Ronswords | [ Reply to This ]
  neat poem...interesting that you basically told us that we'd better read your stories or else. i liked it. it was honest and it made you seem untouchable. locked up in your lair. kinda like you can see us but we cant see you. pretty sweet.

i tip my hat and bid thee farewell.
| Posted on 2006-11-01 00:00:00 | by PoeticNonsense | [ Reply to This ]

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