Sign up to EliteSkills

Already have an account? Login to Roleplay.Cloud
Forgot password? Recover Password

Bedtime Story

Author: beatthedrum
ASL Info:    55- F - Southern CA USA
Elite Ratio:    4.18 - 881 /810 /122
Words: 111
Class/Type: Poetry /Love
Total Views: 1640
Average Vote:    5.0000
Bytes: 688


Bedtime Story

The sun checks out early this time of year.
I pull up my comforter without knowing if or
When the alarm will awaken love again, but
I allow drowsiness to open a book of dreams.

As the room darkens images become bright
In this graphic novel of nocturnal notions from
My favorite author of beautiful bedtime stories.
I am delightfully enlightened by your artistry

There is no hope that you will write me into the plot.
Perhaps I might have fortune to be a bookmark placed
Between the dog-eared pages of fantasy and fulfillment.
Instead of simply another scrap ripped from a rough draft

Submitted on 2006-11-02 21:08:12     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
Edit post

Rate This Submission

1: >_<
2: I dunno...
3: meh!
4: Pretty cool
5: Wow!


  Hi Chrystine,

I am thinking this is one for the reading tomorrow. Or it gets my vote anyway. That very rich use of metaphor and nice crafting between the sheets, of paper, mind you!

And while you've said you would like more time to write these days, if they're coming with this quality, sleep in and enjoy! I love it!

| Posted on 2006-11-12 00:00:00 | by nansofast | [ Reply to This ]
Do not find the words to express how I liked this wonderful peice.. I agree with both Clay and EmpathicAya that it is a well-written peice and I wish to be the half of you and write such beautiful peices... The line I liked most :
" I pull up my comforter without knowing if or
When the alarm will awaken love again "
Great Job..
| Posted on 2006-11-06 00:00:00 | by Khaled AbdAllah | [ Reply to This ]
  The beautiful places of dreams are amazing, and this poem just has a really warm feeling to it, Chrys. I love it that you made the dream the author, I thought that was very original, and cool. I really love the first line of the poem, and I think it's because it affects me a lot, so I know what you mean when you say it, in more of a spiritual sense than anything else. This poem is beautiful, and a fave. Thanks a bunch for sharing.
Love, Light, and Dreams,
| Posted on 2006-11-03 00:00:00 | by EmpathicAya | [ Reply to This ]
  I am in awww...BEAUTIFULLY written and spellbinding.
Just the feeling of being wrapped in warmth yet the there is still a chill plunging to the core and rattling your bones to be not only remembered but apart of the bigger picture...a hollowing wind sceaming and tearing all hope of the end being full of light and glowing of happiness.

Plus I love the've used it so well I feel the grasp of an old book...a fav read over and over...that will always be the same...yet more and more beautiful or sad every time...YEAH!!!

This is not only a FAV but is going down as one of the best damn reads in months...THANK YOU
| Posted on 2006-11-02 00:00:00 | by clay | [ Reply to This ]

Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

1. Be honest.
2. Try not to give only compliments.
3. How did it make you feel?
4. Why did it make you feel that way?
5. Which parts?
6. What distracted from the piece?
7. What was unclear?
8. What does it remind you of?
9. How could it be improved?
10. What would you have done differently?
11. What was your interpretation of it?
12. Does it feel original?